Always

seven

LUNA

I found myself in the school restrooms by the time classes were over. My cheeks stung from the cold and my eyes burned and felt heavy. I was beyond tired.

I shifted a shoulder, massaged the back of my neck but the lingering pain refused to leave.

Sighing, I pushed the sleeves of my sweater up and turned the tap on. And froze. 

The pain in my chest was sharp and swift.

Thin, white lines scattered across my arm, fading into the skin by now but the cold made the stand out a little more today. Every look at them was a constant reminder of it all; all the dumb things I had done and forced myself out of. It was a constant cycle of hurting myself and then stopping for a bit only to start again.

And although every time I didn't want to start again, I always ended up in the same stupid cycle.

Someone knocked on the bathroom door and panicked, I slid my sleeves back down. Before they could open the door, I grabbed my bag from the bathroom floor, swung it on my shoulder and slipped out of the bathroom.

Tanner had football practice, apparently. Walking down the hallway, I shot him a quick text telling him I'd go home with a friend. A blatant lie.

There was no one here willing to give me a damn ride and there was no one here who I would want to ask for a damn ride. Amity didn't show up today. Leo left between recess. I wasn't just going to ask the guy in my Biology class to drop me back to my place. So the only other solution was to walk it back.

I sighed, stuffing my phone into my back pocket. Pushing open the school exit door, I stepped out, shivering as a cold gust of air blew past. The parking lot was already vacated and only a few teenagers stood around, either waiting for their cars or starting aimless conversations with each other.

I shifted my bag on my shoulder, staring at each and every one of them.

"Are you going to stand here all day?" A voice spoke from beside me and I jumped. Whipping my head around, my eyes met a pair of dark blue ones. My shoulders relaxed immediately.

My lips quirked. "I don't know. I just might."

He chuckled, stuffing his hands into his pockets. "You're something, Hudson." He shook his head, amused.

"Thanks."

"You got a ride?" I hesitated for a moment before shaking my head no.

He jiggled his keys in his pockets. The both of us fell into silence as we stared out into the parking lot.

"Let's go somewhere." My eyes flickered back at him, surprised at his sudden words. His chin tipped up slightly, staring into the sky. His breath fogged in front of his face and he watched it silently, before a small smile tugged at his lips.

"Somewhere?" I prodded, smiling despite myself.

He finally turned his head towards me, grinning now. His nose was bright red and I wanted to reach out and pull the hood of his jacket over his head so he could be less cold. Curling my hands at my side, I smiled back at him.

"Okay." I whispered.

***

I gripped my stomach, doubling over in laughter at his purposefully horrible attempt at singing. Kyler was a great singer, I knew it from the first day we met. And I also knew he was doing this to make me laugh.

The wind blew through our hair, freezing my cheeks. For a moment I considered cranking the windows up, but then changed my mind. The wind, the cold, felt good. The howling sound overlapped with the music blasting from the radio and Kyler's loud voice as he followed along with the lyrics of the Neighbourhood's Sweater Weather.