The Playgirl's Game

Kabanata 34

"This is the final boarding call for passengers booked on flight 428E to Manila, Philippines. Please proceed to gate 2 immediately. The final checks are being completed and the captain will order for the doors of the aircraft to close in approximately five minutes time. I repeat. This is the final boarding call. Thank you."

Hindi ko mapigilan ang panlalamig ng mga kamay ko. My heart is racing so fast and I can't tame it.

I'm here. I am finally here.

Hindi ko natupad ang sinabi ko. Nandito ako sa America ngayon hindi dahil sa wakas ay makakapaghiganti na ko ngunit dahil sa anak ko.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breathe.

Relax, Trish. You won't see Zac here. Masyadong malaki ang America. Hindi kayo magkikita rito.

I went out of the airport and I saw Jonathan. He was waving his hand towards me so I smiled at him. Niyakap naman niya ako.

"Long time no see, Trish." He greeted. Niyakap ko lang siya ng mahigpit.

"How's my daughter?" Tanong ko. He look at me and smiled wryly.

"She hasn't gained her consciousness yet but the doctors told us she's fine and stable. CT-Scans were clear."

Nakahinga ako ng maluwag. Iyon lang naman ang makakapagpalagay sa loob ko. Ang malamang walang brain injury o ano.

Nung makarating kami sa ospital ay agad akong dumiretso sa kwarto ng anak ko. There I saw mom and dad sitting beside my daughter.

My heart ached when I saw her situation. May benda ang kanyang kaliwang braso pero para siyang anghel na natutulog. Mom and dad went to me and hugged me.

"Ma..Pa.." I greeted. Tumanda ang itsura ni Papa. Six months ago was the last time I saw them.

Tuwing pasko lang at birthday ni Chyler kami nagkikita. Magkikita lamang kami sa Japan tuwing magkikita kami. For years, that's the case. Tanggap ko nang hindi ko maaalagaan mabuti si Chyler kung nasa Pilipinas siya. I am so busy with La Casa. Atleast here, mom and dad can look after her. Tutal ay nasa bahay lamang ang clinic ni mommy. Jonathan is also here to check in her.

How can I take care of her kung magcocollege pa lang ako noon?

I even went home schooling during my fourth year highschool just to keep my pregnancy.

"Kamusta ka anak?" Tanong ni mommy. I smiled at her weakly.

"Masama ba kong ina, ma? Imbis na alagaan ko si Chyler, nagpapakain ako sa galit ko dahil iniwan kami ng ama niya?" My eyes swelled and my heart hurts. Hinawakan ko ang kamay ng anak ko. She's twelve now.

My mom hugged me.

"We understand why you did that. Pero anak...Hindi ka pa ba tapos anak? Baka panahon na para palayain mo ang sarili mo sa galit. Kung gaano na katanda si Chyler ay ganun na rin namang taon wala si Zac. Maybe you just have to accept it and start living for your family."

Tuluyan na kong humagulgol sa narinig ko sa ina ko. I have been a terrible mother. I left my child and took care of the anger I have inside me. Ito, kung naalagaan ko siguro si Chyler ay hindi siya madidisgrasya.

"Mommy?" Agaran akong napalingon nung marinig ko ang boses ng anak ko. Agad akong napayakap sa kanya at lalong humagulgol.

"Chyler! I'm sorry...I'm so sorry.." I cried. Hinalikan ko ang anak ko sa noo at sa pisngi.

"Why are you crying, mom?" She asked. Ngayong pinagmamasdan ko siya, parang may kirot na namuo sa dibdib ko. She is my child. But I stole her the chance to have a family. Hindi man kasama si Zac ngunit kasama ako. Ang laki na niya, dalaga na ang anak ko.