Why would he love me?

Welcome to the squad

Garrett

God, he's so beautiful. I just can't stop staring at him. His smile. His eyes. Just everything. How can he make everything still seem like so much fun?

We've been filming since 9 and he's still managing to laugh at all Shane's jokes. Maybe he feels like he has to on the day of his reveal. Or maybe everyone else is so bored of his jokes by now that we've given up.

I mean, I've known the guy for a while now. I can't complain though. I could listen to that laugh all day.

"You ok Garrett?"

"S-sorry I got distracted."

"Hmm distracted huh?" he says, winking at me.

I blush as everyone turns to stare. Glaring at him, I turn and try to focus on the video.

"So Andrew, how does it feel to be revealed?" Ryland steps in.

I give him a small smile in thanks for diverting the attention away from me.

"It's been great."

"I was thinking we could maybe do a Q & A or something dumb like that tomorrow so we could get to know you better."

"Sure, I'm down for that I guess, it might even be fun," He hesitates, unsure of what to do now, "It's getting late, so I should probably head home. Do you want a lift Gar?" He says with a small smile.

"N-no thanks, I'm good."

Wow, real smooth. He shrugs and walks out to the car. Giving me a final smile as he disappears from view.

"SEE YOU TOMORROW," Shane shouts after him.

As soon as the car pulls out, they turn on me.

"What was all that about?"

"Nothing."

"Didn't look like nothing." chimes in Ryland.

I glare at them both. God, they can be so annoying sometimes.

"Well if it's nothing, then you won't mind what we're doing tomorrow."

"What's happening tomorrow?"

I thought we were just doing that dumb question thing. Why would I mind that?

"We're setting Andrew up on a blind date. You know, like we did for you."

Shane smiles hopefully at me as if reliving the 'beautiful' memory.

Oh boy. How could I forget that cringe fest? Worst night of my life by far. It was just so uncomfortable. And forced. And it was clear Alex was having a bad time. No wonder we only met up once again.

"T-that's great?" I sigh.

Andrew is going to kill us. Well, me. I know he hates stuff like this. Especially on camera.

"See you tomorrow then."

Shane waves goodbye as I grab my stuff from the corner. He's clearly desperate for me to leave. God knows what he and Ry have got planned for tonight. Apparently, it's very intimate. That's all I heard before begging him to stop telling me about it.

I walk down the long drive slowly. Unwilling to get home. To the mess of my home. I should really clean it at some point. I clamber into the car sighing.

Hell yeah, I can't wait for tomorrow. It's going to be torture. I tap my fingers on the wheel of the car, impatiently waiting. Traffic jams are the worst.

As I finally pull into my house, I suppress a shudder. I hate this apartment. It feels so empty without anyone else. I wish Andrew was here right now. He'd fill up the space with his laugh. God, I want him. But I can't have him. He's straight. And I'm gay. The odds aren't in my favour.

I wade through the clutter before flopping on to my bed. I'll clear it some other time. Damn, has it been a long day. A long weird day.

Andrew📽: Hope u got home safe. X

Oh god, he sent a kiss. Get a grip, that doesn't mean anything. You're not 16 and in high school again.

Me: Yeah thx. Excited for tomorrow. X

Andrew📽: Me too. See you tomorrow. Gn. X

Me: Gn. X

Me: I love you...

I delete the message. Imagine if I sent that by mistake. That would take a lot of explaining. A shit load of explaining. And we'd probably never be friends again. Tomorrow is going to be one hell of a day though.

Although I'm happy we finally 'exposed' him. Don't get me wrong, he deserves all the love and attention. I'm just going to miss it when he was just my best friend.

I'm glad he gets on so well with Shane and Ry but I miss him. I miss him just being Andrew. My best friend. Now he's going to be Shane Dawson's cameraman. Oh well, maybe I'm being selfish, I just hope the fans love him as much as we all do. God knows he deserves it.

Shane🐷: u ok about tomorrow?

Me: yeah I guess

Shane🐷: K see u tomorrow. Gn

Me: gn

(A/N so that was chapter 1. I promise it will get longer and more interesting. When Garrett posts on YouTube he asks a question so I'm going to do that as well.)

Qotc: What's the awkwardest thing you've ever had to do?

My answer: I'm not sure actually. I've done a lot of awkward things in my life. That's how it be sometimes.