The Fight For Us [ON HOLD]

SEVEN

Hey guys, the letter dates are not chronological too.

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Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Guess who I met up with today? Yup, Jared. It feels like years since I last saw him, he looks great. He has a current dilemma which he told me about, he wants to drop out and follow his dreams of becoming an actor. He has an agent and he feels he can make it big but he doesn't want to disappoint his mum.
Those thoughts have also crossed my mind but I can't, I owe it to myself to see college through even though what I have going on is huge. Coming from the place we all came from, we owe it to ourselves to have something to be proud of. I just hope he finishes and then goes to pursue his dreams.

-H

HAYDEN'S POINT OF VIEW.

Her face pale, so pale that one would think she's dead, I keep on checking her breathing to remind myself she's alive. Her chest rising up and down slowly, her eyes shut with strands of hair on her face.

I shouldn't have left; this morning and 8 years ago, this is all my fault, she says leave and I go.

I am so useless and stupid, I haven't seen her in years and I stand up and go to work like a robot. I could see she wasn't doing good but I claim I don't want to pressure her, how stupid.

What if I am just protecting myself?.

Maybe I don't want to know what she has been through, maybe I don't want a reality check that I put her through all that.

"Mr. Hayes." I looked up at Dr. Brown who left to use the washroom. Dr. Brown is around his early thirties, he lives in a penthouse in the next building, we have had a couple of drinks together and his wife along with Scarlett are good friends.

"I don't know how to thank you for today." I stood up from the chair I was seated on.

"Anytime bro." He has a questioning look on his face since I came in, he's probably wondering how I am related to Lainey since he doesn't ask, I am not going to speak about it.

"Is she going to be okay?" I asked looking at her sleeping figure.

"Yes but..." I turned to him immediately he paused, my heart stopped for a second.

"But what?" I swallowed hard, awaiting his reply. His lips pressed in a thin line probably trying to gather his words, his eyes stayed glued at me.

"Did you see her scars bro? I don't know who she is to you but I don't think she is mentally okay and I am afraid that this occurrence won't be the last." All I could pick out from his words were "won't be the last"

"I should go, my shift starts an hour from now." He gives me a friendly pat on my shoulders before leaving the room.

I stood there trying to crack her mind, go into her thoughts, what she might have been thinking when she took those pills, why she felt the need to. We were okay, right? We were doing good, if she had a problem she could just call me and I'd have listened.

I would always listen.

I feel helpless, she's hurting and there's nothing I can do about it. I want to give her space so when she's ready, she could talk but I feel it's only going to make it harder for her to tell me.

I placed my hands inside my pockets once I heard my phone buzzing, I brought it out, staring at the caller's ID.

It's Jared.

I almost forgot I called him earlier this morning when everything wasn't such a disaster, I was going to tell him the good news of Lainey's arrival.