Don't Let Go

CHAPTER TWENTY THREE

October 30th 2018

Louis hadn't smiled since the day of his and Harry's picnic.

Louis had a feeding tube now, unable to eat. Harry remembered the day it had been put in. Louis had screamed and cried in fear and pain, that hadn't been a good day.

Louis who was no longer able to sit up without Harry holding him up, spent all of his time in bed, or in Harry's arms.

Louis had been having seizures. Each one worse than the last, each one also ending with an overnight hospital stay. He'd always be sent home the next day, and Harry was always so grateful for that. For being able to have Louis at home. That meant he was still okay.

Louis still recognized Harry most of the time. And to Harry, that was success.

It was  a cold afternoon, and the husbands were cuddled up in the rocking chair, Harry quietly watching old videos of him and Louis together as Louis lay in his arms, incoherently staring at the wall.

Harry knew Louis' time was running out and he hated that all he could do was cuddle him. He couldn't heal him, no matter how badly he wanted to.

"Hmmm I think it's about time for your bath," Harry said gently after a while. He stood up with his precious husband cradled close to him, and carried him up to their bedroom. He lay him on the bed, pressing a kiss to each of his cheeks. "Gonna be right back, I've got to get your things."

He filled a small bin with water and soap, got a wash cloth, some dry shampoo, along with a fresh nappy and set of clothes for him, bringing them back out.

"Alright, lets get you nice and clean sweetheart." Harry said gently. He first started with Louis' hair, spraying it with the dry shampoo, and combing his fingers through it.  Louis loved the feeling of Harry's hands in his hair, but Harry had no idea since Louis had no way to express it.

After his hair, Harry gently removed Louis' sweats and nappy. He dipped the washcloth in the warm soapy water before rubbing it over Louis' body in careful circular motions.

Louis just stared up at Harry helplessly. He recognized him, as he was the person who was constantly around, but he had no idea who he was.

Once Louis was all cleaned up and dressed again, Harry hooked up a bag of tan liquid to Louis' feeding tube, before cuddling him again.

"I love you boo" He murmured, pressing a gentle kiss to Louis' shoulder, frowning when he noticed a bit of a temperature.

"Are you feeling poorly love?" He asked nervously, looking at him closer.

Louis' eyes were unfocused and moving about which made Harry nervous. When suddenly bile was falling from Louis' thin lips and the left side of his face was starting to droop, Harry panicked.

"Shit shit shit" Harry mumbled pulling out his phone and immediately dialing the emergency number. He frantically explained the situation and was told an ambulance was on the way. He knew how to handle seizures, but this, Harry didn't think this was just a seizure.

"Stay with me baby, stay with me." Harry murmured, pressing a kiss to his now boiling forehead.

Bile continued falling from his lips every few seconds, and Harry was freaking out. He was so scared for his sweet husband.

The paramedics arrived, quickly lifting Louis onto a stretcher, as Harry sobbed. "Please be gentle with him. He's my husband!" He cried out, holding Louis' frail hand as he was taken out to the ambulance.

Louis was in and out of consciousness the whole ride to the hospital as the paramedics tried to keep his fever down.

"Please Louis, please. You've gotta be okay." Harry whispered as his lover was poked and prodded at.

***********

A stroke.

Louis had suffered a stroke.

Not uncommon with Alzheimer's patients, but still not a good thing.

"So when is he gonna wake up? Is he okay?" Harry asked the doctor as he sat beside the hospital bed where Louis lay asleep, all hooked up to wires and tubes, a breathing mask over his sunken face.

"It'll be several hours. And well, he's just lucky to be alive." The doctor said, "Strokes are very common with Alzheimer's but with him being in the later stages, it's not looking good for him. It's definitely done additional damage to his brain."

Harry nodded solemnly, and grabbed Louis' hand, kissing it gently. "Oh my, sweet Lou." He whispered.

It was hours later when Louis finally awoke, his eyes wide and confused as he scanned the room. His blue eyes eventually met Harry's green ones.

"Hi," Harry said softly.

Louis just stared at him, not recognizing him at all. Where was he? Who was this man? What was going on? Louis just closed his eyes again as it was all too much, he couldn't think right now. It was too much. Too much.

"Baby...." Harry teared up, realizing that Louis was worse now. Much worse. "I'm so sorry." He whispered.

The words Harry spoke were all a jumbled mess of sounds to Louis, and all he wanted was silence. He was so lost, so scared, so confused. And Harry's once calming voice was now so foreign to him, and only made everything worse.

"So is there anything I need to know for when he comes home? What precautions-" Harry began, but was cut off by the doctor's voice.

"I'm so sorry, but this time Louis won't be returning home."

Hey guys! Sorry for such a depressing chapter, and I know it's short, but it's symbolic. This book is meant to be short and meant to have short chapters because quite honestly, life is short and ends in places that we don't want it to. Anyway, hope you enjoyed this chapter! If you did, please vote and leave any comments or feedback you have.

As always, have a wonderful day !!! All the love.

-Sunnie