Wattitude Magazine - September 2012

11 - Rave Corner

Werewolf or Vampire?: That is the question.

     So my title for this issue is a little misleading because I'm not going to be debating about which of the above mythical creatures is superior (though I know most of you have strong opinions on that topic). No, today is all about the new writing craze: vampire- and werewolf-centered stories.

     Now, I won't deny it: I read all four of Stephanie Meyer's Twilight saga books. I, however, didn't enjoy them tremendously but still, I read them and even spent eight bucks on a ticket for, quite possibly, one of the worst movies I've ever seen. And ever since, the new writing craze hit the ground running. Vampires and werewolves are now some of the most popular subjects written about in mostly romance and teen-fiction novels here on Wattpad. I think I'm being pretty fair when I say that it's getting really old, really fast.

     Ever since Meyer, vampires have become beautiful, brooding, buff characters in fiction (did you enjoy my consonance?). I, for one, miss the dark stories of vampires luring in their victims before feasting on their blood. It's not a very pretty mental picture, but you get the idea. But now? Now they've transformed into creatures that love "with all their souls!" The undead do not have souls, my lovely writers! In the words of Captain Jack Sparrow, "Where has the blood gone?" Don't get me wrong!- some vampire stories here on Wattpad are wonderfully written, the plot being complex, the descriptions sound alluring and they pull you into a storyline that's nowhere near similar to Twilight's bedazzled vampires; but I concede defeat. Few are like this. Although I may not be looking in the right place for these rare works, I have nearly given up hope.

     Now onto werewolves! Sorry, Team Jacob, but I'm not a fellow cohort. So vampires become hot and sparkly, so... that must mean that werewolves are evil and vicious, right? Another "no" that I regret having to say. Werewolves have morphed into tall, built, hot monsters. Where on earth is the mangy fur? The hairy body? In all of these werewolf mating stories I find on Wattpad, not once have I seen a description of hairiness! Just that "My eyes raked down his luscious tanned body, ran across his smooth, tanned chest and came to rest on his washboard abs that were so ridged and defined that I could probably do a whole load of laundry on them. And boy, did I ever!" If this sounds like a story you'd like to read, I'll let you know I came up with that just this second, but I digress. Either way, smooth chest means no hair! Even Jacob Black had a hairless chest in the movies! Where is the logic, people?! I thought that Jacob cut his long hair short because it had an effect on the length of his wolf fur. So in this case, doesn't that mean that he would be the equivalent of a poodle: furry head with a shaved middle? I honestly see no logic in this whatsoever.

     Either way, I think I've slammed enough mythical creatures for the day. Love me, hate me, but just remember to give me your feedback in the comments. Give me your own opinion on it, or just let me know if you liked reading it because I know I had an awesome time writing this! You may see the comment you post in the next issue in our "Reactions" section! I thank you for listening to me rant in the Rave Corner about the woes of modern writing, my lovelies!

Signing off,

      Lexi A.K.A. @RetroGreen