Left To Die // A Violentine Fanfiction

Chapter III: It Should Have Been Me

{ I love this gif of Violet. If you haven't noticed, I'm going to always add something above that will correlate to the chapter in some way. WARNING: Self harm, depression, panic attacks, etc etc. It's all in this chapter bois so get ready for some angst. It's about to get hella real, I'm taking some of this dialouge from my personal experiences. }

The kids dispersed into the dormatories. The news was shocking and heartbreaking. The shit Marlon and Brody did was fucked up and a wave of sadness fell over the kids. They left Marlon's stiff body out in the rain, none of them being able to handle the sight of him like that. Pre-Apocolypse, most of the survivors of the school weren't friends. Slowly, as the reanimated started eating people and death became common, they all met each other. Some of them talked occasionally, but they weren't as close as they were now. Marlon was their friend and leader. All of them had trust in him, only for it to be shattered. Now his body was lying in the courtyard, and none of them knew what to do.

Violet bunked with nobody. She used to have to sleep in the same room as this girl named Erin. Erin had colorful braces and Violet used to make fun of her for it. 'Why did I do that...?' Violet thought to herself as she laid, curled in a ball on her bed. 'So Minnie is alive... All this time I sat around, feeling sorry for myself when I could have stepped up and done something...'

You are weak.

Violet held onto her head. "Go away..." She said to the all too familiar voice, but she knew it was just her own conscience. Tears fell onto her pillow. Violet hated showing any kind of emotion, and learned how to be quiet when crying over the past years. She hated seeming weak to the others, but really she came off as an emotionless robot.

Why did you let Brody cover for you that day? You should have went. They didn't deserve to be taken by raiders, and you just let it happen. Pathetic.

"Please..." Violet whimpered, tears stinging her eyes. "I know it's my fault." She admitted, sitting up on her bed. If she knew where to look, she would go there herself and try to get the twins back. 'What if she's not the same?'

Of course she isn't the same. She hated killing walkers, and now she is stuck with people that have probably brainwashed her. It should have been you there, not them.

The voice was convincing, almost too convincing. Violet slowly stood up, her whole body shaking. Her mind grew hazy as she grabbed a small sharpened knife. She hated the knife, but it was her only coping method. She lost Minnie, Louis never takes anything seriously, she had no one. { Louis would take this hella seriously, she just doesn't want to hurt him. }

They wouldn't understand. You need this.

Violet slowly slid up her sleeve, and Clementine's voice was ringing through her ears: 'You dont deserve to be hurt. No one should ever hurt you like that, and stop hurting yourself.'

She doesn't know you like I do. Just do it, you'll feel better. Come on.

Violet wiped her tears. "Stop, she's right. I need to stop. The cuts are getting noticable. Please, just go away."

No they aren't. I won't leave until you do.

"Please..." Violet said, just above a whisper.

I am in control, you aren't. Honestly, you should just fucking end it already. You won't though, your attempts at it are pathetic. Get it over with already.

Violet gave in. She sat on the bed, slowly drawing thin lines. She hissed quietly at the pain, more tears coming out. The crimson shade of liquid slid down her arm. As she went on the voice in her head got quieter and the cuts got deeper.