My Life with Jeff the Killer

Chapter 29 - Guilt and pleasures

That night, while everyone was asleep, I sneaked out into the bathroom and locked the door. I took out my pocket knife from my pocket and placed it on the counter of the sink. I placed the toilet cover down and sat down. I took the knife in my hands.

I rolled up my pants to reveal my bare legs. I stared at it, and shook my head. I couldn't do this. I just had to feel the blade pierce my skin. I needed that feeling! But I would be guilty. The thought of me killing Rodney was killing me already. Why not just cut myself until I get my satisfaction? It has been a long time since I have done this.

I closed my eyes and drew the blade toward my legs. I then began to pierce the cold metal deep into my flesh. I could feel it! That lovely feeling. I smiled for the first time in the whole day. This helped me. I went farther making a line. I watched the blood drip down from the wound. Yes!

I made another cut above the first one. This time deeper and bigger. The cold blade going deep into the tissues of my skin. I felt the burning sensation. I made more. Cuts and cuts until I was done. This was it. The medicine to my feelings. Screw the doctors and Therapists. This was it! I felt more then alive as the knife cut into my leg. Blood dripped from my seat. I stood up and put the knife in the sink. I ripped off some tissue and wiped the blood off the ground.

I wiped my legs, and rolled my pants back down. Well, I was done for now. I did not seem to regret this. Why did I stop cutting myself? I washed the blood off my knife and watched the red water drain away.

It was sunny again. The water from the rain was still there. It seemed to be soaking up slowly. I walked out the house. I wore my black hoodie, and walked to school with Jeff. We held hands. He wanted to comfort me from the guilt. He seemed to understand what I was going through here. I smiled and kissed him softly, then walked myself to the front of the school.

"Hey, Amy" said Annabel. I smiled. "Hey" I said. I seemed to whisper my words. The day seemed to go by smooth. No one to disturb me or bother me at all.

"Rodney was murdered!" said Scar. Gunner Scar and Drake were still talking about Rodney's death. They stopped talking once I threw the newspaper on their lunch table. Gunner took it and read the title page. "Death of 6 kids near CVS" he read. I sat and joined them. "I have some useful information about him" I said. Everyone gathered around and listened.

"OK, look. Rodney's father disappeared in the woods. Never came back. His mother committed suicide" I said. "But....how did you..? Drake asked. "Rodney told me about his father about the first week of school, while I was talking to the other's of how harmless the woods were" I said. I seemed to blurt of information.

"And he also mentioned once about his mother" I said. Scar looked amazed. "Go on kid" she said. " He lives near the CVS. If you go behind the first alley way. Then continue down There is this small house or place, he and his group lived in at" I said. I continued. "I don't know about the other kids. They seem to be unknown. But practically they r in some type of gang or what ever" I said.

I stood up. "The newspaper has most of the information" I said.Then disappeared from their sight.

Jeff handed me a box. I looked at him confused. I began to notice that he seemed to wobble in each step. "Come to my house. " He said. I watched him go into the woods painfully. I ran to him. "What's wrong?" I asked. He sighed and lifted up his sweater and shirt. I then saw a large bruise on his side. His flesh seemed to be cut off. I shook my head. "Come on" I said, as I helped him walk.

That night, I helped him up the stairs, and to the bathroom. I shut the door, and took off his clothes. "Ooww OOH!" he groaned. I could see the pain sting him. He couldn't move. I took off his sweater and shirt. Then his pants until he was in his underwear.

My heart seemed to beat as I began to reveal more of his car. "Oh shit. What happened?" I asked. "One guy had a gun and shot me" he said. "You don't have to do this" he said. I shook my head. "Dud, your in pain. No way I'm leaving you here" I said. I opened up the box, and saw medical tools. I took off my sweater. It seemed to be a mistake to wear my white Misfits shirt.

Wow. His bruise was worse. I picked up a small knife and slowly dug into his flesh. I could see the bullet in ther. He yelled in pain as I reached for the bullet and took it out. I placed in on the sink. "I saw another hole in him and took out the bullet. "OUCH! HOLY FUCK!" he yelled. I felt sorry for him Blood dripped down and splattered on my shirt. I was done picking out the bullets.

I looked at the other tools and began to close shut the wound shut. I then rubbed, rubbing alcohol on it. "OW OW!" he yelled. The alcohol seemed to burn shut the wounds. I calmed him down. After that, I washed up all the tools and put them back I cleaned the blood off the bathroom floor. "Thank you Amy" he said I smiled at him.

I helepd his out the room and into his bedroom. I layed him there on the bed. "You need to rest" I said. I touched his forehead. "I'll be right back" I said.

Luckily there was ice in the fridge. I reached it out and put plastic wrap and a tissue over it. I ran up stairs, and into his room. I gave him the ice. Jeff placed the ice on each of his wounds. I smiled. Tonight, I'll be staying here tonight to watch him.

"Here is a sandwich" I said. I gave him a tray of food. There was water, apple juice, a sandwich, and some chicken soup. He thanked me and ate. I felt good. Helping him out.

After dinner, I tucked him in bed. I kissed him. Later I shut the lights. "Go to sleep" I whispered. Suddenly he seemed to studder. "Wait...what?' he asked. "Go to slee...." Wait. I shouldn't really say that. "Get some rest" I said. "OK" he replied.