Love Letters to Sally || Louis Tomlinson

19.

19.

"And that will be all today, I will see you next week okay?" I bite my lip and nod my head at the older man who gives me a fake smile. "Great, have a nice day Mr. Tomlinson."

"Okay." I mumble halfheartedly and walk out of the small white room. Walking down the long hall I enter through the lobby and out the front door without another glance. I thought the session could have gone a bit better and less questioning. I was expecting the councilor to be able to answer my questions and actually help me with my problem. After this I just wanted another drink which wasn't good at all.

Sighing in frustration I quickly get into my car and start the ignition, rubbing my cold hands together trying to get some warmth. Blasting the air conditioning and relaxing to the warm air now spewing through the vents, I finally pull away from the curb and into the lane.

I was more than disappointed wasting one hour of my life to answer ridiculous questions. They were supposed to help me, not ask about my life. It was as if they were focusing on my background than the addiction itself. Maybe it was because they knew who I was? Possibly I can find someone who has done private rehab sessions with other famous people, maybe then I could get the help I was so desperate to find.

Turning onto another road I find myself nearing the hospital. I didn't know how I was going to break the news to Niall, he will be disappointed in me. A feeling of guiltiness settles in me once I park my car, resting my head on the stirring wheel I groan in frustration. This was the worst fucking day.

~

"I get to leave this fucking place tomorrow!" Niall nearly screams in excitement once I enter the room. I laugh at his enthusiasm and take a seat where Olivia would normally be.

"Where is Olivia?" I ask propping up my feet on the bed. Niall hits my feet with his arm but I make no move to take my feet down. Niall gives me a playful glare before answering my question,

"She went out to get something." He shrugs and ruffles up his streaked hair. It was nearly brown, Niall has been driving the fans insane by darkening his hair even more every year, this may finally be the year he officially goes brunette. "How was today?" Niall then asks remembering what had happened today. I sigh trying to avoid eye contact with him.

"It didn't go so well."

"What do you mean?" I look at him to find his smile gone and his shoulders slumped. This was the reason I never wanted to confront Niall with this issue, no one likes an unhappy Niall. Folding my hands together I close my eyes leaning my head back trying my best to explain a good reason.

"I thought taking a private session would be much better for me, but all they wanted was my life story. They didn't focus on my addiction, not a single question was about my addiction. I need to find someone else and I'm not doing that ridiculous support group again."

"It's okay."

"No, I don't want you to say it's alright." I interrupt him taking my feet down from the bed and leaning onto my elbows throwing my head into my hands. "Because it's not alright, I know you are disappointed in me Niall and I'm sorry."

"Louis, lad, it's alright we will find you someone new and better." Niall rests a casted hand on my back, sitting up in his bed. I shake my head feeling the panic start to course through my body.

"It's useless, I can't get better Niall. Do you remember how many rehab facilities I've been kicked out of so far? This is the fourth time, I can't do this again."

"We can get you help Louis, just stay positive alright?" I nod my head and wipe away the tears that threatened my eyes. I breathe out a large shaky breath and tug at my messy hair.

"It's hard to stay positive when you are losing all hope."

"Don't lose hope Louis, I'm rooting for you." At this a small smile twitches on my lips. Niall breathes out a quiet laugh once I look into his eyes.

"Thank you Niall." He then winks at me before his facial features become all serious bringing me curiosity. "Did I ever tell you the real reason why I was heading to your apartment that night?"

"The boys told me you were coming to apologize about speaking to Eleanor." Niall shakes his head, a small smile playing at his lips when he looks around for someone. He then leans forward and whispers,

"I wasn't going to apologize about speaking to Eleanor about you, do you really believe I would apologize for speaking to a friend?" I shrug with a chuckle. Niall raises his eyebrows thinning out his lips in a straight line, a playful look in his features. "Well I wouldn't. I came to ask you an important question."

"What was the question?"

"I was wondering if you would be the best man at our wedding." I stare at Niall for a long time, not sure if he was actually serious. I try to find the words to speak,

"When did you propose?" I furrow my eyebrows. Niall rolls his eyes before answering,

"I haven't proposed yet."

"Then how do you know that she will say yes?" I ask. Niall glares at me before hitting me on the shoulder. We both start to laugh before he asks,

"Is that a yes?"

"Yes I'll be your best man." I lightly smile at him. Niall nods his head and leans his head back, sinking into the white pillow behind him.

"I'm so happy I'm finally out of here."

"I'm happy also because maybe than I won't have to waist all my gas to visit you here."

"Fuck you too." Niall mumbles closing his eyes. I roll my eyes and relax more into the chair closing my eyes also, once I close them an image of Jean flashes through my mind.

Her smile is all I see, it's bright and beautiful. The smile even reaches her bright jade eyes, but suddenly the picture I see turns into Sally. She has blood all over her face and her neck was in a crooked position.

Dear Sally,

It's dangerous falling for Jean. I can tell just how dangerous it is to love her. She's fragile, beautiful, amazing and everything I'm not.

How can I fall for an angel when I'm nothing but darkness?

Sincerely,
Louis Tomlinson

P.S,

Please stop these terrible nightmares about you.

{ Word Count : 1134 }