Finding Scarlet

Chapter Five

Chapter Five

Scarlet

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

I'm so naive. How many times does it take for me to realize that no one is going to help me? There's no such thing as a knight in shinning armor that will rescue me and save me from my demons; there isn't anyone here who can take my hand and lead the way home. I am totally alone.

I was almost fooled. Once again, I have been deceived, tricked into believing where there isn't any hope left. I thought that maybe Toby was different; something in his blue eyes gleamed true.

But Toby was different. I can't explain it, but something deep inside me tells me that he is my saving grace, no matter how hard my mind screams that he is just like the rest. Maybe it's just that I was so desperate, so ready to get out and find my family and return to a sense of normality and familiarity that I lack here.

Then again, I'm not the damsel-in-distress type: maybe I just have to suck it up and figure it out on my own. I knew I could never count on anyone anyway. I don't know why, but I feel like I had experienced this sensation before.

I sigh, running my fingers through my hair to the back of my neck, and slam my foot into the ground in frustration, woodchips spraying into the air. I stare at the low sun on the horizon, until my eyes blur and mirror its intense brightness behind my eyelids with each rapid blink I take. Why wont it damn move?

"My mommy says that if you look at the sun too long, you will go... um, brind."

I turn around quickly, silently scanning the area until my eyes land on a little girl at the far edge of the playground, nervously twirling a section of her blue dress around her finger.

I release the tension in my shoulders, and sigh quietly. "I think you mean blind."

"That's what I said." She deadpans, before she pads her way towards me, her earlier nerves nowhere to be seen.

I watch her silently approach, making no move to allow her to come any closer, but also none to stop her. "Right."

She finally reaches my side, inclining her head as she peers at me. "You look weird."

I take no offense at her words, but raise my eyebrow anyway. "That's not a very nice thing to say to someone."

She looks down at her feet and blushes. "Sorry."

"It's okay."

I watch as she recovers herself, before she looks back up and smiles at me. "Wanna play?"

I shrug, and rise out of my seat. "I've got nothing else to do."

"Great!" She bounces around me and takes my previous seat. She looks over her shoulder towards me and grins. "Now make it a big push!"

When she faces back around again, I roll my eyes and sigh. I grab the metal chain holding each side of her seat and pull it with me as I take a couple steps backward, before putting all my weight into the swing as I thrust her forward.

"Weeee!" She squeals, laughing as she sails high into the air, before gravity takes hold and she comes falling back. I follow her momentum as I prepare for another push, making her soar higher into the air. She shrieks again, her curly blonde hair whipping her face as if she is in a fierce windstorm.

"Higher! Higher!" She laughs, flailing her legs as she swings back towards me.

I smirk, before I catch her in my arms and run as I push her towards the sky with all my might.

As she reaches the highest peak, she releases her grip from the chains supporting her swing and jumps from her seat, sailing through the air.

I watch in shock as she flails around as she quickly descends, and before she hits the ground I am already running.

She lets out a wail of pain when she lands, woodchips spraying everywhere from the impact, and then the air fills with her cries.

"Oh my god, are you okay?" I drop to her side and roll her over onto her back to access the damage. Her cheeks are smeared with tears and blood from her nose and a gash on her forehead, and she's cradling her arm tightly against her chest. My fingers shake with adrenaline as I try to calm her, but she just wails even louder.

"I want my mommy!" She cries, jerking away from my touch. "I want—I want to go home!"

"I'm so sorry." I say, guilt flaring up into my chest and choking my throat.

Her gaze looks past my shoulder, and she hiccups. "Mommy?"

And then the strangest thing happens.

Just before I was about to blink, her forms flashes like an exploding star and then she is gone, leaving me staring at the empty space in front of me where she used to be.

I sit back on my heels, bringing a hand to my forehead. Am I hallucinating?

Oh my god. I'm going crazy. No. I am crazy. Now it makes sense. I'm losing my mind.

"This can't be happening." I mumble in disbelief, slowly standing up and shaking all over. Anger starts to boil in my veins, gradually rising and rising and rising and rising...

"This can't be HAPPENING TO ME!" I scream, grabbing woodchips from the ground and throwing them at the play structure, the wood pattering against the metal and plastic. I slam my foot into the plastic slide, creating a small dent before I grab a swing and throw it over the metal frame, tangling it around the poles and out of reach. I grab the fence with my fingers, shaking it profoundly and kicking at it, while screaming and yelling in anger. The fence rattles against its frame, but does not budge, making me even more furious.

"Let. Me. OUT!" I scream. But no one can hear me; no one is listening.

Finally my anger subsides, leaving me physically drained, and I slide down the fence and pull my legs to my chest, burying my head behind my knees.

I'm gone.

"...Scarlet?"

I flinch, not wanting to believe my ears. My mind is playing tricks on me. But I slowly lift my head anyway.

Standing behind the tangled mess of the swing set, is someone so familiar. Tall and lean stature, brown floppy hair, deep blue eyes... it's Toby. Oh my god, it's Toby.

I let out a breath. "Now I really must be loosing my mind."