Toxic Lips [l.h]

f i f t y s e v e n

"I have no feelings for you, Alaska. I would rather crawl on my hands and knees back to Isabel than ever have feelings for you."

His words hit me hard, and I bite my lip to keep from crying.

"You're lying," I call him out as he pulls into the lot of our apartments, parking the car and getting out hastily.

I follow him quickly, having to run to keep up with his long strides.

Drew did this, I know he did. He wants to tear Luke and I apart, and he's succeeding.

"What about all the time we spent together?" I shout, grabbing his wrist to make him stop walking.

"What about when you let me stay those night with you? What about when you let me sleep next to you? What about when you said if you had one wish, you'd wish for me? What about when you kissed me, Luke!?" My voice cracks.

Luke doesn't meet my gaze. "You're the one who said you didn't feel anything," he snaps. "You said it to Drew's face, right there. I saw it."

"I said that because if he found out I did have feelings for you, we'd both be screwed!"

His eyes snap up to me. "You have feelings for me?"

"Of course I have feelings for you, Luke! For the love of God, how could you not know that by now!? You... you ignite this fire in me that I didn't know existed, Luke. Whenever I'm around you there's like this force that draws us together, and I don't know why or how but I'm addicted to it."

He doesn't anwer.

"It doesn't matter though," I say. "Because you don't believe in any of that, right?"

He looks down.

I shut my eyes, taking a deep breath. "YOu don't believe in happy endings, prince charmings, and certainly not love."

I open my eyes and turn on my heel, entering the lobby and leaving Luke to watch me walk away.

I think I hear him call my name, but I ignore him and take the stairs up.

I slam the door to my apartment behind me, tears overflowing my eyes.

I hate Drew, I hate him so much for doing this. He saw right through my lies, and used them against me.

I drag myself into the shower, trying to wash away the events of the day, but it's no use. Luke's hurt, dark eyes still swim through my mind.

I change into pyjamas and sit in bed, turning on the TV, slipping lazily through the channels.

It's past elevem pm, and I have no desire to sleep when I know Luke will only lace my dreams.

I finally fall asleep around midnight, the TV still on low volume in the background.

And as I drift off, I realize I don't only have feelings for Luke.

I love him.

-

When I wake up the next morning, I make myself some coffee and watch the morning news.

Around ten I get dressed and straighten my hair, and write a shopping list.

I feel almost numb from my encounter the night before.

At eleven I gather my things and step out into the hall, turning to lock my door behind me.

OF course, just my luck--so does Luke.

"Hey," he says and I force myself to look at him.

He's wearing a Green Day and black jeans, his black coat draped over his arm.