My Last Hope[republished from Aff] by Venelle

11 Talking

Sehun doesn't pay attention to any paint that falls from his palette. He grips his paintbrush tightly as he makes angry, long strokes. He doesn't answer his phone when it goes off; several people are trying to contact him. Baekhyun, Chanyeol, Kyungsoo, Tao. Luhan has knocked on his door a couple of times, but he never responds. He doesn't blame Luhan for Tao. Of course, why would he? It's only until he finally sets his paintbrush that he finally speaks out to the knock on his door,

"Just come in," Sehun calls out. He's not surprised when Luhan slowly walks in. He smiles weakly and goes over to Sehun with a cup of tea in his hands. When Sehun doesn't take it, he sets it down on a nearby chair.

"Sehun...are you okay?" Luhan asks. "Tao said you felt sick and-"

"Don't listen to anything Tao says" Sehun interrupts, staring at the plop he calls art. "I didn't leave because I felt sick."

Luhan frowns, his eyebrows raised in confusion. "What do you mean?"

Sehun lets out a long sigh before he slowly stands. "I left the club because of Tao, Luhan."

"Why? What happened?"

Sehun thinks about not telling him for a moment. But then he starts to imagine how Luhan will look when Tao breaks his heart. His big, innocent eyes wide, red, and full of tears. No makeup and eating a tub of ice cream. "Luhan, I left because Tao..." he leans against the railing of the balcony and watches as people walk by down below on the street. "He kissed me, Lu."

Luhan stares at him for a moment, his mouth slightly open. He makes a sort noise as if trying to think of what to say.  He clears his throat before speaking. "W-what?" He asks and his voice cracks.

"Lulu, I...when I went to the bathroom, Tao followed me. He kissed me and then I yelled at him."

"Tao...also told me that you're not dating Kai."

Sehun closes his eyes. "I'm not. I wasn't going to lie to you but...but then I got mad at Tao; I wanted to make him jealous." he opens his eyes and sighs. "I got all dolled up like that so Tao would...I don't know, want me or something. But...but then I thought about you."

"Me...?"

Sehun nods, smiling at his roommate. "I thought at that moment that Tao might actually like you," He admits. "After Kris and his bullshit; I want you to be happy..." Sehun feels relieved when Luhan slowly loops their arms together. A clear sign he isn't angry.

"To be honest," Luhan sighs. "I...I've seen the way Tao looks at you. I just thought maybe..."

"He'd forget about me?" Sehun asks, and Luhan nods. "He doesn't deserve you anyway. Tao...isn't good for anyone right now, I think." His heart aches when he says that.

"I don't know what to think..." Luhan says, his voice quiet.

"You think whatever you want," Sehun responds and smiles. "Kai...reminded me that you're an adult and if you get hurt by not listening to me..."

Luhan nods slowly before he rests his head on Sehun's shoulder. He sighs as he looks at his phone. Sehun frowns when he sees that it's Tao calling. He puts it on silent and slips it back into his pocket. He thought telling Luhan would make his roommate hate him or something. "Sehun?"

"Yeah?"

"What's...it like between Kai and you?" Luhan asks, and Sehun sighs. That's, as much as he wants to fight it, an easier feeling to deal with. Tao makes everything he feels complicated. "Do you...really like him?"

Sehun watches, as if on cue, a motorcycle parks out front. Kai hops off and swings his keys before entering the building. Sehun blushes and leans down, resting his chin on his hands. "Yeah," He finally admits. "I think I do."