Craig of the Dead

31. I'm Just Really Into Trumpets

"Kenny! Come over here, check this out!"

"Whatcha got there?" I asked, looking up from my coloring page. Yeah, I know they're for kindergarteners, but those commercials on TV aren't wrong. Karen, however, chose to go a different route, free drawing on the white printer paper sheets instead.

"Look!" She beamed, holding out her creation proudly for me to see. There was one big purple flower crudely drawn in the middle of a flower patch. Huh, I guess lack of artistic skills runs in the family. Still, seeing how happy she was with her work, I couldn't help a huge smile from spreading across my face.

"I mean, let's face it. You're basically Da Vinci!"

"Stop it!" She giggled, the mere sound of her laughter warming the air. She signed her name at the bottom with a crayon and put it in her growing pile of masterpieces. It had taken me a ridiculously long amount of time to find my little sister, but looking at her bright smile, knowing she was happy just to see me, it made it all worth it.

"Purple's still your favorite color, right?"

"Duh. It's the best color." Of course it was still her favorite color. I had actually first made my Mysterion costume with that in mind.

"I know, you've only told me a billion times. This makes a billion and one I think." There was a short silence, the air being filled with Karen burning through crayons and the occasional crinkle of a sheet of paper. Karen broke the silence with a single sigh, halting her coloring.

"Hey....... Kenny? I know you probably don't wanna talk about this—"

"Hit me. C'mon Karen, what's up?"

"Okay, well I was just wondering....well, why did you leave?"

Fuck, that's what we're talking about.

"Look, I am so sorry. I got up to go get some headache medicine for you. I was planning on getting back before the two of you woke up, but I got lost on the way back." She glanced up from her new drawing to stare at me, obviously not satisfied with my answer. Now that I looked at her new sketch, it was kinda looking like Mysterion. It was nothing new, Karen drew her Guardian Angel a lot, but the timing of this particular picture just made me feel worse.

"Kenny, I don't believe you." She always was the smartest in our family. Despite her age, she was probably more intelligent and mature than Kev, Mom, Dad, and me all combined.

But she was still an eight year old little girl who didn't deserve to have her childhood ripped away from her. Especially not by me. I could still remember the one time I had overestimated her maturity, a stupid mistake I would never make again. I dunno why I decided to share this part of my life with her, or what stupid reasons I had for doing so, but I had sat her down and told her about my power. My curse. I had already tried with Kevin, but he's as dim as a door nail, so I dunno if he even processed what I told him. He was probably drunk or something. But I really thought Karen would get it. She's so smart, she'll understand I had told myself. Well, I couldn't have been more of a fucking idiot. I mean, what the hell was I thinking? She was fucking seven at the time, and I had expected her to process my curse? Instead, Karen had bawled her eyes out, squeezing my chest because she was so afraid I was going to die.

In the end, I decided to kill my self, right in front of her. It was the worst moment of my entire life, hearing her screams echo in my head as my body slumped on the floor. But I've died enough times to know how my curse works. A little while later, I woke up in my bed, good as new. After some sly investigating, I found that Karen had no recollection of my sudden suicide, nor of the conversation before it. In fact, according to her, she had never stopped playing dress up with her doll.

Now, looking into her puppy dog eyes, I knew there was no way I could tell her the truth. Not now. Not ever.

"Okay, you got me. I found a few awesome magazines in the store and may have spent a little too long drooling over them. I just lost track of time, I fell asleep, and when I woke up there were a bunch of zombies heading for me. By the time I had killed them and started heading back your way, you were long gone." It pained me to see the disappointment wash over her face, but I didn't regret my choice. I've lied to millions of people before, this was no different.

"The headache wasn't even that bad..." She mumbled under her breath.

"I know, I just thought I could've helped a bit."

"You didn't have to, Kenny. I was fine. I'm not some doll or something, you don't have to protect me all the time."

"Well, what if I really want to Karen! I mean, what would I do if anything bad happened t—"

"News flash!" She shouted, slamming her crayons on the table. "Bad things are gonna happen to me. You can't protect me forever Kenny! Get over it! Find a new hobby or some shit, I dunno...."

"Karen, watch your language." I got a wet raspberry in response. "You wanna end up like Kevin? You wanna end up like me? Karen, you are such a great person. You are so bright, and I'm just waiting for you to be the first one in our family to graduate college. Or high school, for that matter. Look, what I'm trying to say is.... I love you. So much. And I know I can't protect you forever, but I sure as hell can try, can't I? Now come on, I can see your puffy eyes. C'mere." I held out my arms, embracing her as she buried her face in my chest, completely breaking down. A lot of things have been happening really quickly, and it was only a matter of time until the shock caught up with her.

I hugged her tightly as she completely drenched the front of my tank top with tears and snot. I'm not sure Nicole would want this back afterwards. It was kinda ironic. The whole reason I had asked the girls for a change of clothes in the first place was to get into something clean. The cleanness had lasted about an hour.

"You're the best big brother ever..." She sniffled, pulling away and wiping her nose with her sleeve.

"Thanks. I try." I grinned, ruffling her hair.

"Look Kenny," she pointed to the Mysterion picture, "Guess who this is."

"Is it a self portrait?"

"No."

"Is it Mr. Mackey?"

"Be serious Kenny!"

"Fine, how about your Guardian Angel? Is it him?"

"Yeah! You're right! How did you know?"

"You only talk about him all the time. What, are you making a portfolio just of Mys— Guardian Angel drawings?" Crap, that was close. I honestly don't think she noticed though.

"Oh yeah... well, he's the most heroic person I know! Remember when he saved me from that bully! Man, I wanna be just like him when I grow up." Although it wasn't meant to be a deep comment, or one that she focused on much, the sentence kept repeating in my head. I wanna be just like him when I grow up.

"Well, better make a note then. Be less horny, more heroic. Got it." I said, flashing a thumbs up at her.

"Wait, I gotta ask. What does that word mean? I hear it all the time, especially about you, but I'm not quite sure what it means..."

"Karen, it means I'm really into horns."

"Wait, really?"

"Of course!" I snorted, trying to keep a straight face. "Trumpets, trombones, tubas, you name it!"

"Oh....that doesn't make a whole lotta sense." She said, sitting there with a puzzled look on her face.

"Not a lot of things do, Karen. Being horny is one of them."