The Drugs Of NYC

Chapter 8

When I woke up, the knocking had stopped. I go downstairs and make me some cereal. My eyes are extremely red from crying. My phone rings and it scares me. I jump. It's Troop.
"Hello?"
"Hey it's Troop. Meet me at the Park to collect your paycheck."
"K."
I eat my cereal, make some coffee, drink the coffee, get dressed, do my hair, and leave. But when I walk out, I see Connor, laying on my porch, sleeping. I don't know why i did this but I picked him up (he was heavy) and brought him inside and put him on my couch. I wrote him a note telling him to stay here and we'll talk when I get back. I went to meet up with Troop at the park, he congratulated me and gave me my paycheck. The other two debt collectors thanked me as well. One was a boy and one was a girl. I went back home to find Connor sitting on my porch. When he saw me walking up, he stood up and started walking towards me.
"Alex can I-"
"Go inside." I told him.
He listened and he went inside I told him to sit on the couch and we began to talk. Before I tell you what was said, I should probably give you the back story. Me and Connor were super in love. We loved each other so much. We'd been dating since high school. When my mom kicked me out, I lived with him for a while , then he bought me my own apartment. I had just turned 18, and one day, i came home, and he was gone. He didn't leave a note or anything. He wasn't at his house either. I kept checking for months. He was never there. That damaged me. He had just left me. I felt weak. I had to begin begging for money just to pay the rent for the little apartment he got me. He had just up and left. He was acting strange a week before he left but always said it was nothing. But then a couple months after I had turned 19, I began to work for Troop, and I bought a house. A good house. A nice house. But I never forgot how Connor had just left me without saying anything. But now here he was, and he was about to tell me everything. I sat down on the couch beside of him and he told me what had happened. This is what he told me. When he was with me, he was having a great time, but something happened, that made him feel uneasy. He had a best friend, who he had known since 2nd grade, and they were best bros. But while he was staying with me, his best friend passed away. This made him extremely depressed and he was never ready to tell me because it was so sensitive for him. But he became so depressed, and he needed something to relieve the pain, so he got on drugs. He began buying from Troop, but eventually, he owed some debt that he couldn't pay. He told Troop that he had a girlfriend (me) that he needed to take care of, and Troop threatened to kill his girlfriend (me). So Connor thought it would be safer for him to leave me. And since he wasn't paying my rent anymore, he payed his debt and continued to stay on drugs. Connor explained to me that Troop isn't aware that he hired the same girl he threatened to kill, years ago. It was a lot to process but I did.
"I'm so sorry for your loss, Connor."
"It's fine."
I hug Connor. He hugs me back.
"So um...are you addicted to drugs?" I ask him.
"You see, that's the thing, I've never really been addicted to it." He says. I look confused so he begins to explain.
"I don't feel weird or get mad, when I don't have it. I don't crave it either. It's just that, when I don't have it, I go back to being sad."
"Why don't you get depression meds?" I ask him.
"I don't know. I was so stupid. For some reason, drugs seemed more helpful in my mind." He replies.
He cries and begs for me to forgive him. I forgive him and tell him my life story. We shed tears together over our life stories without each other.
He makes me aware, that he was staying in an abandoned building. I tell him that if he stops doing drugs, he can stay with me. He later goes and tells Troop that he doesn't wanna buy from him no more. Once you quit on Troop, he can't see you again or you'll get beat or killed. Troop tells him not to come around no more. Connor doesn't tell Troop about me. I take Connor to the store and buy him some clothes and hair products and stuff. His hair was always in a ponytail, even when I knew him. He was mixed with black and white, and he had straight, light brown hair that he always wore in a ponytail. He barely ever wore it down. That night, he sleeps in my bed and it's the one night ever since he left, that I feel safe.