Pillow Talk

Chapter 14

"A-a baby?" Freya questioned in shock.

The part about being in love with a woman, she understood but a baby was really, really serious.

Nixon had created an entire life with Ava. They were basically a family. Something she had longed for her entire life.

"Sì. Ava was 2 months pregnant. I was about a month into the mission when we found out.", Nixon sighed as he tilted his head up, "I couldn't support her much during that time because it was important that we had as little contact with our family as possible. A safety thing."

Freya waited with baited breathe for him to continue.

"When Ben got killed, Ava had a panic attack when she found out and fell down the stairs in our apartment. That's how... ", he cleared his throat, "That's how she lost the baby. I was in the hospital at the time."

Nixon's eyes stared off into in the distance like he was remembering something.

"She always had anxiety issues.", he whispered to himself.

Freya's head was reeling with all of these revelations, her tears flowing now as she couldn't stop them. Her mind wandered. Was Nixon still in love with Ava? Did he still long for her? She wanted to ask him but she was too afraid of his answer.

Nixon sighed, taking a seat on the white bench along the pathway they'd walked. He sat hunched like the weight of the world was on his shoulders.

Freya stood rooted to her spot, tears blurring her vision as she thought about the possibility of Nixon telling her that this thing between them would never work because of his painful past that obviously still haunted him.

"Tesoro, I don't love her anymore if that's what you're thinking.", he interrupted her negative thinking.

His beautiful blue eyes were focused on her now, studying her every reaction. Now that she knew about all of the ugliness that he carried with him, was she still willing to try?

Taking careful steps, Freya joined Nixon on the bench.

She placed a hand hesitantly over his, her other hand reaching up to wipe away her own tears. Nixon turned her hand under her's, gripping her hand tightly as they stared at each other.

"I would understand if you did Nixon. You share so much of history and experiences with her.", Freya's voice was even and clear.

Nixon sighed, admiring how understanding and accepting this woman was. She truly was a beauty, on the outside and more so on the inside.

"Do you still want to try with me Cara?"

The importance of this question hung thickly in the air between.

Freya turned away, something still bothered her.

"What about Emma?", she asked, her eyes locked on their joined hands.

Nixon had been dreading this question. Now that he'd had time to think about that fucked up arrangement they had made, he actually felt ashamed. He should have known better than to shove his cock where it didn't belong.

"Tesoro.", Nixon begun, "I'm embarrassed to say that it was just sex. We made this arrangement at a time when both of us were going through some difficult stuff. I didn't know that Emma would take it more seriously than it actually was."

Freya took a moment to process everything that he'd just said. It made her question something about Emma, something niggled at her nerves.

"Nixon, do you think my sis- Sara", she quickly corrected herself. "And Emma meeting was just a coincidence?"