under the same sky | chaekura

Eunbi: Sakura

I knew it the moment she came into the room 2 days ago. I really wanted to talk to her but I didn't know what to say. Wonyoung couldn't speak either. I was just about to say something when Chaeyeon came into the room. We all discussed about how pretty the girl was. Chaeyeon thought so too. I was jealous then cause she'd get to spend time alone with her. I told myself: Eunbi, that's okay. They'll come back. She's in your class for goodness sake. You'll have plenty of chances with her. But they came back late that night. Good thing is that she sat beside me in Yena's room that night. And I couldn't help it. I practically stared at her the entire time. 

The next morning I found out she was a year younger than me. So I didn't have the liberty of seeing her for the first half of every day. But she was all I could think about during classes. After our last class, Chaeyeon left in the other direction, as usual. I never would've thought she'd choose to follow. I never would've thought Chaeyeon'd let her. We always knew she liked her time alone to practice and we'd always give it to her. But maybe Chaeyeon has a soft spot for her. What did they talk about during the tour that already made them so close? I was losing the race. 

During dinner I found it in me to sit beside her before Chaeyeon could. Was that what made her upset? It can't be. Chaeyeon's not petty. Did I make her mad? I hope not. We're both fighting for the same person. And Chaeyeon doesn't back down without a fight. She never would have left the table just because I sat next to Sakura. Sakura was worried the entire time, though. Even if Minjoo went to check up on her. Even when she fell asleep. I was still awake by the time Chaeyeon came into the room with Minjoo but it took Chaeyeon a couple of sobs before she could fall asleep. 

We woke up the next morning to find Sakura gone, but Chaeyeon was fast asleep. She hadn't changed out of yesterday's clothes. I told Wonyoung to wake her up and we all went to class together, skipping breakfast because the 3 of us were already late. During lunch time, Chaeyeon still wasn't feeling well but this time, Sakura was quick to take Chaeyeon to the dorm to let her sleep. I was going to go check up on them but Minjoo stopped me, saying something about being the class representative and having to explain to the teachers about their absence. So I didn't go check up on them. 

But here I am now, looking at her asleep, with Chaeyeon beside her, hugging her.

"They're so cute, it's like they're already best friends," Wonyoung says, standing beside me, also watching the two of them. "You should wake them up, unnie." I place a hand on Sakura, who gets up all of a sudden. She must be a light sleeper. She stretches, looks at Chaeyeon, then looks at me.
"Did I miss everything?"
"Yeap! Lucky. Class was boring today. Especially Musical Theory. But we had a lot of fun during Jeongmin's class."
"It's okay," I say, trying to console her. "I'll fill you in later." I offer her my hand, hoping she takes it. And she does. So I smile. "Let's go get dinner."
"How about Chaeyeon?" I stop for a split second. I'm already here. I might as well just go all the way.
"She needs her rest." I lightly nudge her in the direction of the door. "Let's just get her a sandwich later."

"Where's Chaeyeon?" Minjoo says, looking around. Her gaze drops to my hand, still holding Sakura's. "Why isn't she eating dinner?"
"She needs to sleep," I say, avoiding her eye-contact. "We can just get her some food later." Minjoo starts to devour her dinner and gets up to leave.
"I'll go find her. She shouldn't be alone." Minjoo takes a glance at Sakura for a while before deciding to really leave to find Chaeyeon. I felt Sakura squeeze my hand. She's been looking down this entire time. What's up with everyone here? Does Minjoo know Chaeyeon likes Sakura? But Chaeyeon's not out. Or does Minjoo know that too? If she does, shouldn't Minjoo be angry at me? She seemed angry at Sakura instead. So maybe me liking Sakura isn't what's gotten Chaeyeon so upset. And I think only Minjoo and Sakura know why.
"It's okay," I say, letting go of Sakura's hand so we could eat. "She'll be okay." She half-smiles then eats the rest of her dinner silently.

"Where'd they go?" Yujin asks. I enter our dorm room, to find it empty. "Eunbi unnie, did they say where they were going?"
"No...they didn't," I say. Yujin's the most worried I've seen her. I turn to look at Sakura, face burried on Hyewon's shoulder. Yena and Yuri are busy asking around the level. My knees are weak and the next thing I know my hands are in my face, burning with hot tears. "I'm sorry." I try to stop myself from crying but I can't. "I should've chased after them too. I should've asked, at least." The rest of the girls gather around me.
"Unnie, it's not your fault." Yuri, squats down next to me, her hands resting on my knee. I almost say 'it is' but I catch myself. If I had said it, I'd end up admitting my crush on Sakura, I'd embarass myself, I'd embarass Sakura but I stop myself because if I had said it, I would have pulled open the closet door on Chaeyeon. That's the worst thing you can possibly do to a closeted person. And I'd never forgive myself if I outed Chaeyeon. She's one of the nicest people I have ever met. If she didn't exist, I would've probably fallen apart last year. She helped me talk the principal into giving us another chance this year. She gave me so much support behind the scenes and all I've done was try to take her crush away? Even if I knew Sakura would probably never like me like that, I still persisted. I was that selfish. This is all my fault.

"Unnie, guys!" Yena runs out of room 406. "Haeyoon says she saw them walking towards the North block."
"Dance studio. It has to be." Chaewon gets up and presses the elevator button. "It's the only place Chaeyeon would go. If we go there now, we might still catch them."
"We can't all go. It's almost curfew." I look at my watch, getting up as well. "A big group like us is sure to get caught."
"I'll go," Sakura nods.
"Me too," Yujin says, entering the elevator.
"Come back quick, we'll try to cover for you if anything."
I nod and together, Sakura, Yujin, Chaewon and I run to the dance studio at the North block.

"Seriously? Past curfew 2 nights in a row?" Yujin runs over to hug Minjoo. We caught them just after they left the studio. Sakura runs over to hug Chaeyeon too.
"2 nights?" I almost scream as we all turn around to see Jeongmin. We stand frozen, all of us trying to decide between telling the truth and coming up with a good excuse. The five of them take glances toward me but before I could say anything, he continues. "It's okay." I look up at him, surprised. "All of you go to bed and make sure this doesn't happen again. Eunbi, can you hang back for a sec?"
"Oh, uhhh-" Chaewon looks back and I nod to tell her to wait and stay first. "Sure."
"Is Chaeyeon okay? She looks like her dog just died." I hesitate and he notices. "Look at me. I need you to be honest with me."
"She isn't okay," I start. "But something tells me she'll be okay soon. We'll all help her."
"Look- You girls have an incredible friendship, it makes me jealous. It's nice to see you all come here for Chaeyeon. But don't make this a habit. That and tell the girls we're having a meeting tomorrow. Have your lunch quickly and we'll see each other in the homeroom by 2pm sharp. No dance and vocal classes."
"Got it."
"Goodnight Eunbi."
"Goodnight."

"So you're telling me Jeongmin let us off the hook AND he's managed to convince Ms. Kim to skip lessons for this competition?" I nod at Chaewon. "What's he aiming for, teacher of the year?"
"He's good, though. We'll need his support to win this year."

I enter the room to find Chaeyeon fast asleep. And I smile. Because tonight, she wasn't sobbing.