OC Reviews [on hold]

Jetstream [WoF]

Name
Jetstream

Nice name

Age
19

Gender
Male

Sexual Orientation
Not filled in

Tribe (biologically)
SkyWing

Allegiance
Formerly Queen Condor of the SkyWings, (this is around 2,000 years after the first book, so just a fair warning), now to a SeaWing named Trickle, who leads a makeshift tribe of misfits, freaks, and others like him

You might want to decrease the time gap a little... 2000 years is a little too much, don't you think?

Occupation
Formerly Royal scientist assistant, now just a normal scientist that works with a HiveWing named Sap (he was struck by lightning as an egg, and has electric power, has no normal HiveWing abilities, and the lightning canceled the whole 'mind control' thing') (His family ran away, and eventually came to Pyrrhia)

If a dragon egg was struck by lightning, the dragonet inside would die. And there is NO sensible explanation for why he has 'electric power'. Just remove the 'he was struck by lightning' part.

So here's how you can change this:
-Remove the whole thing about Sap and his 'electric ability' whatever that is, replace it with something like 'he has an animus touched armband that gives him the ability to produce and handle all voltages of electric currents safely'
-Say that he was born outside the hives(since his family ran away), so the queen could not get to his egg and make him mind-controllable (MUCH better that 'lightning canceled the mind control')(and yes it was mentioned the Hive Queen book how the queen can mind control her subjects, and trust me it wasn't genetic, and Queen Wasp was the only queen that had that power)

Technically this isn't at all related to Jetstream's occupation... but oh well

Abilities
Normal SkyWing abilities, but is a slightly faster flier from his huge wings.

Don't point out his huge wings. Every SkyWing has them. Simply saying he flies father than most SkyWings is fine.

Relationship Status
He's mates with Trickle's sister, Bubble, an excitable animus (the only animus in the books) SeaWing with aquamarine scales. Has the slight swirls under her wings. One of Turtle's many many nieces.

So she's... 2000 years old? :0 what

Change it to 'She is a distant relative of the SeaWing Royal Family, descended from Prince Turtle'

And how exactly is Bubble excitable? If you mention it, you should at least explain it a little.

Physical Description
Jetstream is very slim and aerodynamic, sharp ends to cut through the winds with ease. He has bright red scales, with a slight tint of orange to them. Has yellowish/pale gold underscales, with slightly wings wings them most SkyWings. Do to poor eye sight, he wears a pair of glasses that wrap around his ears, connects to a small chain to keep them on just incase. Has kind yellow eyes, and ink and oil stained talons from taking so many notes and helping Sap. Has necklace with a small purple gem in it that Bubble made him.

As far as I know, dragon glasses go between their ears and horns, and then wraps around their horns to keep them stationary.

Other than that, he's good!

Personality Traits
Jetstream is very reasonable, and is a good listener to others. However, he isn't good under pressure, and has a small tendency to have panic attacks if he's too pressured. He tries to be as polite as possible to others, but has a short temper if they aren't polite. He is very smart, book smarts that is, not that good at common sense involved situations. My friend who's into anime calls him 'Iida Dragon' cause apparently he acts like Iida from My Hero Academia