Save me

chapter sixteen

Cameron Reese

I heard the news from my parents that Ayden's mom had died in the hospital. As soon as they told me I ran to our room to check on him. I was worried about him. He was sitting on his bed not doing anything. Just laying there. He didn't look sad or happy. He didn't have any emotion on his face.

I asked him how he was to which he responded great. He wasn't upset. He wasn't hurt. He wasn't crying. It was like nothing had happened. He made a phone call to someone I assumed one of his friends then I heard him say I love you mom.

That's when I knew, that Ayden was in denial. He thought his mom was still living. That's why he wasn't upset. That's why he wasn't crying. That's why he was acting normal.

I went downstairs to tell my parents. They were down there telling Ryan, Ayden's younger brother, the same news. My mom was holding him as he cried.

"Dad, can I talk to you for a minute?" I asked. We walked out of the living room and into the kitchen for more privacy.

"He's in denial. He doesn't think his mom is dead. He called her cell phone." I told my dad everything Ayden had done.

"Yeah, that's expected when you lose a loved one, for them to be in denial. They don't want to believe it's true." He explained to me.

"What do I do?" I asked him.

"You can't do anything. He has to be the one to realize she's gone. The only thing you can do is be there for him, comfort him. That's all you can do. You can't take away their pain." My dad told me.

"Okay." I nodded my head and went back upstairs to see Ayden in the same position as when I left.

I walked over to his bed and sat down next to him. "Maybe I should call, just one last time. She's just busy right now. It's close to the holidays." He was reasoning with himself.

I couldn't let him keep calling her and getting no answer. He would never get to hear her voice again. She would never answer his phone call again. It was impossible. She was gone. I couldn't let him think that he was going to get some kind of answer.

"Ayden. Your moms gone. She's not coming back. She is dead. She won't answer the phone, no matter how many times you call or leave voicemails" I told him. I had too.

"Why would you say that?" He looked up at me with tears in his eyes. It felt like someone had ripped my heart out of my body. I hated seeing him sad. I couldn't stand to watch him be upset and I had no control over it. I couldn't make him feel better. I just had to watch him go through the pain of losing someone.

Ayden got off his bed and stood in front of me. He was slightly taller than me when I was sitting and he was standing.

"I hate you!" He said to me. He took off his necklace that I had given him and threw it on the ground. "I hate you so much! You're the worst person in the world!" He yelled at me. He walked over to my bed and started throwing off all the pillows and blankets from it onto the floor.

"You're so mean to me. You hurt me. I hate you." He started grabbing things off my dresser and throwing them at me.

I knew he didn't mean those words. I knew he didn't hate me. But it still hurt a lot to hear those words coming from his mouth. I walked over to him and stopped him before he could grab anything expensive or breakable. I hugged him even though he tried to push me away from him.

He was crying so hard he could barley talk. "G-g-get-t-t  of-f-f  of  me-e-e" he said. I wouldn't let him go though. I held him tighter in my arms. He turned around so he was facing me and started punching me in an attempt to make me let go of him. His punches were weak though and they failed to work on me.

"Ayden. Calm down. Please." I begged him.

He cried in my arms harder and kept saying "She's gone. She's gone. She's gone."

I felt so useless at this moment. Nothing I could do would make Ayden feel better. He was grieving with the pain. I felt like I had been holding him forever until he had stopped crying and was just standing there with me.

"Let's lay down." I said to him. He didn't respond. I let go of him to pick up my pillows and put them back on my bed. I grabbed the blankets and placed them on there too.

I took off my jeans and shirt to be more comfortable. I asked Ayden if he wanted to change his clothes and all I got was a nod. I took off his shirt and pants. I walked back over to my bed and laid down. He soon came over and joined me.

I pulled the blanket over us and hugged him. He didn't respond. He didn't say anything, move, or even look at me. He laid there looking up at the ceiling.

"You should get some rest." I told him. Ayden nodded and closed his eyes. I held him until I fell asleep. I hoped to wake up and this all be some horrible nightmare. But this wasn't a nightmare. This was reality.

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