A Proscriptive Relationship

:A Proscriptive Relationship: 42

That was what Shawn had said. A small frown appeared on my face. Was that Holly and I that much alike? It was a little nerve-wracking. How could two people be so much alike?

"So you used me as a replacement for her?" I demanded. "Didn't you care about the person who I actually was? Did you even think a little of my feelings?"

"I was too caught up in you're looks," Mr. Heywood responded honestly. "I was too distracted by your appearance to think about your feelings."

"That's horrible!"

Mr. Heywood nodded his head in agreement. "It is."

"So then, everything you said to me... was it all a lie?"

"No, I meant every word I said to you. Not to the other Holly, but to you."

"But I thought-"

Mr. Heywood held up his hand. "Yes, at first you were a replacement. But as I started getting closer to you, I began to realize how different you were from her."

"But you just said we were a lot alike," I pointed out.

"Appearance wise, yes," Mr. Heywood responded. "Personality wise and everything else, no. You're both stubborn, but that's the only thing you have in common. But everything else is different."

"I don't understand..."

"Should I list a few things?" Mr. Heywood asked, a smirk appearing on his face. "You blush easily, you cry easily, you get embarrassed easily, you're too innocent for your own good, you're extremely clumsy, you're too honest... should I continue?"

I felt my face heat up and I looked at the floor. "I d-don't..."

Mr. Heywood laughed. "See? You're blushing."

"I'm not," I responded stubbornly.

"I'll continue then. You're horrible with eye contact, you get jealous easily, you're easily riled up, and, perhaps the most important of all, you're understanding; you don't judge people by what they've done." When Mr. Heywood said the last words, his expression softened considerably as he looked at me.

Once more, I had to look away. That look was to... intimate. "What about me being the replacement? I thought-"

"Holly, you stopped being the replacement that day when I was driving you home and we were talking about our parents! That's when I realized you were different than the other Holly. You cried for me, something the other Holly probably would have never done. From that moment on, I viewed you as Holly Evers instead of Holly Pierce. I haven't thought of you as a replacement since. You could never be a replacement. I'm ashamed to think at first I used you, and I'm incredibly sorry about that."

"Why couldn't you have just told me all of this earlier?"

Mr. Heywood raised an eyebrow. "You mean before you ran away from me in the hospital without letting me explain? There was hardly enough time..."

"I really thought you were just using me as a replacement..." I told him, lowering my eyes and clenching my fist. "I thought everything that happened between us was just a lie. I thought I had been used. It... hurt."

"Holly, do you really think I'm that kind of man?"

I looked up back into Mr. Heywood's grey eyes. Did I...? Immediately my eyes filled with tears and I shook my head. "No! I don't think that at all," I responded, my voice cracking. "I'm sorry, Mr. Heywood. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions. I..."

"Holly," Mr. Heywood said with a sigh, grabbing my arm and dragging me closer to him. He put his arms around me and held in me a tight embrace. "See what I mean? You cry too easily."