𝑻𝑯𝑼𝑮 𝑺𝑻𝑹𝑼𝑪𝑻- finished-

10

Dej

This battle wit myself is making me go crazy I drove to the river and sat down on the rocks and just calmed down cause if I put my hands on that girl she's gonna be my next victim

Yea I have a record when I was 16 this girl pulled a knife on me while we was fighting and stabbed me so I went nuts and beat the life outta her.....,..:,,,literally and I wouldn't stop I got arrested

But didn't go to jail they sent me to the crazy house for two mouths I was away from my mom and my sister for a year

That's why I couldn't go back to being dejanae I was gonna hurt somebody and I knew it was gonna be izzy and that girl next

On the inside I wanted to go and just tell him I wanted him cause honestly I did but I couldn't to much fucking pride that was stopping me but I knew he cared but then again he didn't

Look at me I only knew him for a month i want him it's something about his thuggish ways and how he acted and that kiss and the way I got so wet from his presence

I felt something when he finger fucked me mostly pleasure but he was gentle and how he held me while he did it felt like a freaky fairytale that went bad quickly
my phone rung out and I looked and it was jay I declined it

I looked at the water an smiled at who I am now cause before I was a mess fighting drinking stealing all that I know y'all wonder how I'm a nurse

That case when I was 16 was token off my record so it was clear but to me I still had a record in my head that's how I felt but my phone rung out again and I sighed it was Izzy

Hello"
Were you at"he said his voice was so calm and it was very sexy
Izzy I'm alone I'm ok"
You sure ma"
Yea plus you don't need to be worried about me you gotta girl"
Just a girl I had wit me ma I ain't mean to hurt your feelings but I don't know what you want from me dej"
I don't know what I want Izzy"
Trust me I don't either"
Then what's the point of us going and fucking wit other people if it's gonna hurt the other"
All I know is we need to talk one on one face to face to see what we want now or what we want in the future"
I.."
I'm gonna come by your house soon ma aight ima be busy tmm and ion know if imma see you or not"
We got a lot to talk about"
I know aight calm down ok ima see you soon just prepare your self for it cause I don't wanna here no idk u need to figure out what you want and imma do the same"
Ok I'll see you when I see you"
Aight ma later"

I hung up the phone and pulled my knees to my chest and stared at the water that helped a lot and I felt better about my feelings of idk cause he didn't know either

It was strange to me how we were interested in eachother so fast but there's never a time limit for something like this I just hope thing don't go bad when we do sit and talk

I laid back on the rock and stared at the stars they were beautiful and bright tonight and I wish Trina was here my sister was my all

And you could tell me she ran over my casket at my funeral when you get to heaven and see me Nd ill forgive her and tell god to let her threw the gates

Trina and me been threw some shit and she always said I was stronger than her cause of what I put up with but we were both strong characters shit we out be since so much shit was happening to us

we grew up and got threw that shit and I'm glad we did cause it was a set of twins that we knew who were going threw less shit than us and killed themselves cause it was all to much for them

There deaf affected us to we just kept pulling on to our wagon when we were little and now we more than anybody ever thought we were gonna be.", we were jones and jones can get threw anything

Together