Deal • REWRITE • BOOK 1

22; Say It Right

The sight of my reflection cracked in the splintered glass was ironic, the jagged doubled line splitting my face in half and leaving me to lick my lips before I pressed them together and looked down to my hands.

With my adrenaline slowly wearing off I could feel the slight sting of my bruised knuckles, my fingers quick to take what was left of the tape on my hands off before I threw it to the ground and then turned to my brother.

"Call a guy to fix that," I told him, clearly not in the mood to talk as I yearned for a shower and begin walking towards the door that led to the main level of the house.

Again, Alex didn't seem to get the hint that I didn't want to talk when he did so himself.

"I'm guessing you didn't fix your stuff with Aria?"

"Alex..." I breathed out, gritting my teeth as I inhaled through my nose and gathered every last sliver of patience I had left from the day I was currently having. "I'm not in the fücking mood."

"I'm only asking because she seemed upset when I saw her today."

I stilled.

"What the fück do you mean you saw her today?" I asked, turning around abruptly as I narrowed my eyes into a glare that I aimed at him.

"I thought she would've told you that I was the one who took her to her doctor's appointment?"

"You fücking-"

I couldn't find the strength to pull myself together without wanting to smash Alex's head into the floor, so in lieu of answering to him I walked away for once, my jaw clenched hard as I grit my teeth and felt my chest tighten with my anger that was setting fire to my blood.

My feelings of betrayal that stemmed from my brother's actions were uncalled for, but nonetheless felt when I couldn't help the ugly thoughts in my head despite the fact that Aria wasn't mine as of yet. I wanted to scream at Alex and yell that he had no fücking business being around her, especially considering the terms that Aria and I had been on...something that he seemed to be clearly aware of despite his dámned actions.

"Quella merda di uomo," I cursed under my breath as I ascended the stairs and walked to my room. The sound of the door slamming resonated around between the walls as I made a beeline for the bathroom and undressed myself, my body tense with unaddressed problems as I walked until I was in the shower and wondering what the fück I was currently doing with my life that had taken an abrupt nosedive towards disaster.

I knew I had myself to blame considering the situation that I was in, the very thought amplifying the guilt in my system as I repeated Aria's words in my head and sighed whilst smoothing my hands over my face.

Lucien, I can't have kids.

I swallowed as I thought back to hated sight of Aria being upset, the image of teary brown eyes and shaking hands emphasising everything as I reminded myself that I was the reason why she had been like that in the first place.

It only made everything I feel double into being overwhelming as the seconds went by, the guilt continuously becoming consuming as I thought about ways to apologise to her whilst wondering if she was okay after what I'd put her through.

"She probably hates you," I muttered dejectedly to myself as I turned off the shower and walked out the bathroom once I'd tied a towel around my waist, my hands moving up to move my wet hair out of my face as I breathed out a heavy breath.

The thought of Aria hating me hurt more than I'd anticipated.

It wasn't easy knowing that I'd only put it on my myself as I walked towards my closet with my body feeling heavy, my hands continuously clenching into fists as I ignored the sting of my bruised knuckles until I stilled and turned to the sound of my phone ringing.