Lost You Forever

Chapter 31: Chasing Past Memories, Empty Hopes and Disappointed Visage

Life on Xiao Yue Summit was very languid and lazy.

Zhuan Xu said Sheng Nong Mountain was the same as Five Gods Mountain but that wasn’t true. Five Gods Mountain had no memories but Sheng Nong Mountain, Zhi Yi, Zhe Province, it all had lots of memories in each place.

Xiao Yao didn’t know if she purposely didn’t want to face the past or really was lazy, but she didn’t want to go anywhere. When Zhuan Xu suggested she open a medical clinic like she did on Five Gods Mountain, Xiao Yao wasn’t interested.

Every day Xiao Yao woke up after noon and then flipped through her medical books. Only when making poisons did she perk up slightly.

The Yellow Emperor saw her so withdrawn and suggested “That boy from the Fang Feng family, his name is Fang Feng Bei, right? I see you guys get along well, how come he hasn’t come play with you these past few years? You can ask him to hang out together.”

It was better the Yellow Emperor not mention that because afterwards Xiao Yao got even more uninterested even in making poisons. She spent every day sitting in a daze in the corridor.

One day the Yellow Emperor summoned Xiao Yao and took her into a wooden hut. It was sparsely decorated with only a jade box on the pallet that caught the eye. The Yellow Emperor said “This was the residence of the former Flame Emperor.”

She knew which former Flame Emperor he was referring to but couldn’t help but confirm “The Flame Emperor that is regarded as the founder of medicine?”

“Yes, the one who wrote the Sheng Nong Herb Manual, that Flame Emperor.”

Even though she never met him, Xiao Yao remained curious about him after memorizing the manual so she quietly looked around the hut.

The Yellow Emperor walked up to the pallet and pointed to the jade box “This contains all the notes written by the Flame Emperor when he was doing his medical research. You can read it.”

Xiao Yao wasn’t very interested and murmured “Sure.”

The Yellow Emperor added “Whether he was still alive or after he died, the entire world respects the Flame Emperor more than me. After uniting the Middle Plains and to sooth the people’s will I had no choice but to venerate him, but in truth I never felt he was worthy until I settled at Xiao Yue Summit and chanced upon his handwritten notes. After reading it carefully I finally conceded that I could never match up to him. At least the me of the past couldn’t! Xiao Yao, I have only ever respected myself, the Flame Emperor is the only other person I ever respected and admired in my life.”

Xiao Yao stared in shock at the Yellow Emperor, unable to believe that such an ambitious, brave, and proud Yellow Emperor could have just said that.

The Yellow Emperor said “The Sheng Nong Herb Manual is something you’ve long memorized but no matter how much you know it front to back you have never truly understood it. Don’t look at me like that, after you read it then you’ll understand what I mean.”

Xiao Yao opened the box and picked up the first scroll and started reading.

Once she started she was mesmerized and didn’t even know when the Yellow Emperor left.

From morning until evening, from evening until morning, Xiao Yao didn’t sleep or eat and just kept on reading.

The notes started with the Flame Emperor writing that he personally tested hundreds of plants and herbs to understand what its effects were. He discovered that he was being poisoned by the testing so he started to cure himself with antidotes.

The Flame Emperor carefully wrote down in detail every type of medicine he took.

He needed to catalog the effects of each medicine before and after, and then carefully write down how it affected him after he took it: weakness, pain, deafness, vomiting, spasms, heart murmurs, seizures, frothing at the mouth…..