You Come First

46

1995

I packed my stuff and moved in with Damon 6 months after me and Liam split up. I knew this wasn't the best idea I've had. Damon didn't live in Manchester anymore which meant moving away from my family and Peggy ,as well as leaving my job. Living in London was scary at first but Damon made sure I was comfortable with the place we lived at. I knew Liam and Noel were somewhere around living in their party house Supernova heights. It was different for me and Damon. We partied but never where we lived and never half as wild as Oasis. I was worried every time I read something about them. It broke my heart to see Noel so obsessed with cocaine and Liam was still the same dickhead I left years ago. He tried getting me back but failed on many occasions. When he heard I was moving in with Damon, he left it. I guess something must have broke in him.

And I wondered,
Did He still love me?

When Damon was moving away it was because he found a new love interest. While my love story ended, his just began. Which broke my heart in many ways. I wasn't only losing Liam. Months before our split I began forming feelings for Damon. He was the one there to listen, a shoulder to cry on. A best friend... We spoke about being together or giving things a go if me and Liam were to end. The day it happened I went over to his house, ready to confess my feelings but she was there. Justine. His new girlfriend. I live with the two of them now. They've been together for a good 4 years but she's never around. She's always busy with her band. Although their love is sweet and pure , it reminds me of me and Liam. Once the time for eachother is limited to a smaller amount , bad things happen.

Justine was the only woman I have ever been truelly jelous of. She had Damon but she also had Liams attention. I've seen many interviews where he said he wished she was his because he fancied her. I never knew if he said those things to have a dig at me and Damon or if he truelly meant it. Either way, he knew we would hear about his crush. And he knew it would make us angry.

"You've heard haven't ya?" Damon said- tossing a magazine on my lap. I picked it up and looked at the front cover. It was a picture of Liam and Patsy. Liam gallagher and his new girlfriend seen enjoying eachother's company. " God I wonder who writes this shit ". He made himself comfortable in the seat next to me.

I nodded my head "yeah it's hard not to hear about these two. They're everywhere ". I laughed it off but inside I was dying. I know I didn't have the right to be jelous- but I was. I mean, me and Li grew up together. I was like family to the Gallagher family. I know a lot more about Liam and Liam knows a lot more about me than Patsy or any man I'll ever be involved, ever will. It was hard to let go when I was constantly reminded of him and haunted by the memories of our years together- with the bean necklace still hanging around neck, although it's lost it's charm months ago.

"Don't laugh like that man " Damon took my hand in his and kissed it , then put it back to where it was. "I know it still hurts." He patted my knee then stood up and left to go in the kitchen.

I was glad I never listened to Liam when he told me I couldn't be friends with Damon. I'm glad I pushed him to give me freedom. Otherwise I would be stuck in Manchester doing nothing with nothing but bittersweet memories. Damon was a friend like no other . He always put me first.

"Here, we may aswell have a drink tonight. It's just us two" he passed me a bottle of wine. Holding a bottle of whiskey in his.

"I thought Justine was back from her tour today " I said eyeing the bottles.

"So did I but looks like America's going to need her a little longer."

I knew Damon was jelous of the fact Justines band was really big in America. He wanted that too but it wasn't happening as such. I decided to ignore it and lift his spirit instead "You know what though ?"