**REWRITING You will forever be my always

Chapter 34.

These past two months that she arrived to California Heidi always went over to her brothers place. She didn't have her family here so the only thing close was her older brother.

As much as she told everyone she was okay, and that she didn't need anything she was lying. She needed her friends, family, and someone else, but she had to get through this alone if she wanted to go back home.

"I'm happy to see you." Jason says as he pulls Heidi into a hug.

"Me too, sorry I didn't come last week. I had a lot of homework." Heidi says with a smile.

"It's okay, I understand." He pauses and looks at his sister, he knew her very well, she wasn't doing okay.

"Heidi, how have you been feeling?" Jason asks, Heidi's eyes shoot up to meet his.

"I'm good, living my dream.." she says sarcastically.

"If you want to go back you know that you can Heidi." Jason says holding her hand.

"No. I can't go back because they expect me to finish this and go back." Heidi pauses, "If I could I would in a heartbeat. But that's just going to disappoint everyone, besides weren't you the one who told me to come here?"

"It's not disappointing me. Because you are going back to the person you love, and now that I see you I think it's best for you." Heidi flinches a bit from his words.

"Jason you don't understand. He was the one who also told me to come and fulfill my dream." She says using finger air quotes at the end.

"Is this not your dream?" Jason asks.
"It was. I don't know anymore." Heidi says looking away.

"I know that it hurts like hell, but if you don't at least try the least bit to continue with your life it's never going to stop hurting."

"How? Tell me? Enlighten me. Because I'm seeing this all wrong!!" Heidi yells out as tears start streaming down her face.

She wasn't handling things very well, mostly having to keep her feelings to herself, not being able to cry.

This had affected her more than anything, which is why she has been using sarcasm as her way to deal with things.

"That's the thing you aren't seeing anything, your stuck on one precise moment and it's fucking with your life." Jason continues."Ever since we came here you have been acting different. You yell, you are so sarcastic, mad and it's not even you. I don't know if this is a phase but I want my sister back."

Heidi looks at him and gets up from the couch, "It's not a phase, maybe this is the real me." Heidi continues, "Also how the hell would you know the real me if you left us a very long time ago to know who I exactly am!"

Before he even speaks she leaves his house.
She drives back to the dorm, to find it alone.

Good Kennedy was probably out and she had a very nice amount of time to just break down.

She laid in bed, the uncontrollable tears coming once again.
When would this stop she thought, she never imagined her life would be this way.

"I miss you Anthony..." Heidi says in a whisper, before she drifts asleep.

As she wakes up the next morning she realizes it's only Sunday.

Of course she would be at her brothers but given to yesterday's fight that was definitely not happening.

Her phone started ringing and she picked up without looking at the caller ID.

"Hello?" Heidi says.