Sincerely, Fanboy ~ Vkook

~ The Final Letter ~

A good book never dies for it lives on in the heart of those who lived and learned.

12/12/2020

"Dear Taehyung,

this is my final letter.

I love you more than the sun that we revolve around, more than the ground beneath my feet, more than my phone.

Taehyung I

Fell

Fell

Fell

For you.

I didn't mean to, it's just how it ended up. You didn't cause this, please don't think you did. My home life is worse than you could ever imagine, Tae. My mom is verbally abusive and a hoarder. I'm eighteen now and I left home, but I am so broke. I never told you about how I dropped out of high school. The bullying from the teachers was far worse than the punches from the students.

I'm so fucking doomed, I've accepted it. You were always my safety rope, you could pull me out of the darkest of caves in one piece. You're not the same since you found that girl. You're distant and not as bubbly anymore. I wish I could have gotten to you first.

What could have happened if I had run up to you on the street that day? I heard you were out scouting for new models. I could've been working with you and maybe more. Too bad I jaywalked like an idiot.

I don't know what to believe with religion. When my dog died I just knew that the best of us have to go somewhere better. Am I the best of us? You're the best of us, Taehyung.

I know this shouldn't be the answer, but I lied so often to you about being happy. Happy for me is seeing one of your pictures and not wanting to disappear for that moment.

Please, be happy. I'll love you forever.

Sincerely,
Fanboy"

Then he dropped the packaged notebook into the mailbox, not caring what happens to it anymore. With his hands in his sweatpants pockets, he fought the cold as he made his walk arriving to the bridge of choice.

He smiled remembering coming here as a kid with his grandfather back when he was just a clueless and happy kid.

He felt the tears come but smiled through them. He felt such guilt but didn't feel like waiting for a better tomorrow. He held his breath, it's time.

As the church bell rang 12-noon Jungkook climbed onto the wide ledge of the bridge. Inhaling deeply he felt his last thoughts.

  One... The Sunset.
Two... Butterflies.
Three. Taehyung.

Regret.

But he was falling, and falling, and -