Never Let You Go- Justin Bieber/ Niall Horan Story

Chapter 59:

a/n: hi guys so it's been a month oops haha sorry though im just really side tracked with my life right now but i will start posting because i have things to write and to get marked off my list yay anyways 7.1K wow thank you guys so much. Please recommend it to your friends who you think would like this story or your mutuals on twitter and tweet me at my twitter and we could be mutuals yay im itsHoransHood yay anyways thank you again for the reads and stuff heres chapter 59 enjoy(: oh and i'll start posting probably every other saturday like i said in my status thing or i might post next saturday to make up for the month time gap thing again sorry but enjoy(:

*Justin’s POV*

I said “Elisha, I couldn’t talk to you. You were my girlfriend, the girl I love and for you to see me at my lowest point is beyond stupid” It wasn’t stupid I just didn’t want her to see me at that or those points. She would’ve seen me at my weakest and most vulnerable place.

She replied “that wasn’t your lowest point your lowest point was you drinking and your imprisonment. I was there for your drinking so please feed me some more bullshit” She had me there she was right so I nodded and said “I give you that.”

she responded “of course because I was right but we both know that’s not why you were hurting” I asked “really then why was it?” she replied “it was Avalanna’s passing…” she didn’t just say that so she knew the whole time that I was hurting she tried she tried helping me but she just couldn’t. I said “that was some of it”

she replied “I was there Justin I tried helping you but every time you pushed me away” I responded “I did because I didn’t want to hurt you” she said “but you ended up hurting me anyways” she was still hurting about this and it killed me I was doing good I was trying to get rid of those last memories that killed every time I was thinking those moments when her eyes looked hurt and those times where her voice had a little pain in it.

I hated being the one who hurt her. I hated knowing I caused her so much pain but I need to know how she felt. I asked “how did you feel?” she responded “it hurt and stung like hell. I knew I had to leave even if those rare moments of you being there made me happy.

You were hurting me and breaking me until I had enough I left and I still was heartbroken I cried when no one was home I cried when I was in the car and I thought about it or when you said we would be together forever I cried when I would pass your contact or a song that reminded me of you or every time I thought maybe I would wake up and have a message from him apologizing for everything.

But you never did leave a message and my hurt turned into anger but I still cared for you and I'm still hurt and still pissed. But you know what Justin no matter what hurt you caused me you will always be a part of me” I would always be a part of her and she would always be a part of me but she had Niall and she had their future and I had no one because I ruined it with her and I ruined it with all the other girls because I just love her.

I replied “I'm so sorry for the pain that I’ve caused and I know I can’t take any of it back and I will try and make it up to you even if it takes me the rest of my life” she shook her head and said “Justin, you don't get it you hurt me there are songs I had to delete because of the memories they had and there are places I won’t go because of memories and people I can’t see because of you. You can’t take it back.”

I replied “I will try I have to try even a little. Elisha, just let me try” She replied “Justin, we’ve tried the trying thing it hasn’t worked so far so why would it work this time?” I replied “because you still believe we can make it work” she asked “how do you know I haven’t given up on you?” I replied “because you're here with me…meeting me. You came when I was drinking to try and help.”

She replied “because I forgive people who shouldn’t be forgiven and I don't forgive people who should” I asked “so you don't think you should forgive me?” she replied “Justin, let’s say the roles are reversed if I cheated and I continued the whole relationship, got drunk to forget, constantly worried about you and your new girlfriend, blamed you EVERY chance I got, and I did break your heart would you forgive me?”

Should she forgive me? That was a question I asked myself every day after she left. Did I deserve her forgiving me? No, I never did every time she did forgive me I never deserved it. But she’s seen the worst and the best of me and she was still there she didn’t deserve anything I did to her she didn’t I was selfish and it’s starting to show I thought I wouldve gotten rid of it by now.

She was still looking at me I finally said “no, if the roles were reversed I wouldn’t forgive you. But you always see the best in me Elisha. You’ve always seen the best in me and I think you can now I have changed but the deeper we get into this conversation the more I feel I go back.” She asked “if you changed why did you get arrested for a dui?”

I replied “I got arrested yes but I was under the limit for drinking but I still shouldn’t have drove but the other person was more under the influence” she asked “you mean the girl who is a model?” I wanted to joke and say jealous but I knew it was the time to say that. I replied “yes the model who shouldn’t be a model just saying” she laughed.

I earned a laugh from her god I missed her laugh when it used to fill the apartment. She looked at me and asked “what?” I replied “I really do miss you” she said “I know you tell me every time you see me and I mean EVERY time” she laughed. I replied “because I do I didn’t think I would’ve back then but then it hit when I came back from tour on break and I went back to the apartment and I found the sweatshirt and the key. I moved out of the apartment and into my house because there were too many memories in the apartment” she looked down at her lap.