Regret (Squip x Jeremy)

3. Haven't You Ever Heard of Closing the Goddamn Door?

-Jeremy-

I look down at Squip, for who else could it be? My hand slides to his neck, as if to check for a pulse. His heart beats so fast, racing and racing. Since when do Squips have heart beats?

He doesn't look the same either. Vaguely Asian, but not quite like Keanu Reeves. I close my eyes and picture his brilliant blue eyes, glowing with an inward light that only one person could have. That only Squip has. His face looks a little different but I know it's him, it has to be him.

I fold my hands, watching as he opens his eyes, glow dim. "Jeremy?" he whispers, groaning.

He smiles a little, making my heart plummet into my chest. Adorable. Had I left my hand on his chest? I feel his fingers wrap around my own as his eyes flicker closed again. His eyes are wide, almost childlike. "Jeremy?" he whispers again.

He squeezes my hand before sitting up, releasing me and rubbing his eyes. He blinks a few times. "Oh Jeremy! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to do all that to you, I was so awful! Jeremy I'm sorry!" he starts choking on his own saliva, tearing up, "please forgive me! God I was so stupid! Please Jeremy!"

Squip is crying. It takes us both a minute to realize this and he quickly recovers his cool, wiping his bright, headlamp-like eyes and looking away. "Sorry," he mumbles.

"How are you here?" I ask, sitting back in my desk chair and crossing my arms. He can't just show up at my doorstep, pass out, and make me drag him upstairs like deadweight.

"Dunno. Some Project I think. I can feel things like I couldn't before. People can see me. I feel... alive."

Alive. Squips aren't alive. "But you're still a computer?"

A shrug.

"You still want to make me chill?"

He shakes his head.

"Then why are you here?"

Silence.

Something bright flashes and I blink, realizing it's his abnormally bright eyes. They dim after a minute. "I'm not quite sure yet, but I think to make things right. I'm sorry Jeremy, and I'll do whatever you say to make it up to you."

Damn. The next thing I know I have my arms wrapped around him in a hug. "I need time," I say, still hugging him tightly. I don't know how to answer him, what to say or how to handle all this.

Yet I hug him. He doesn't respond to my embrace and I start to think that it is the wrong things to do. I've probably messed everything up. Not that there is anything to mess up, I haven't spoken with Squip since the play a few years ago. Hell, I should have moved on with my life, heading into college, still the same loser I was in high school.

"I know," his arms find my own and I sigh.

Everyone I know, even remotely, went to the same community college. Probably because everyone I know is a loser. Everyone left except those few in my contact list, sans Christine who has started attending art school in New York.

So now it's just me and him. Him and me. Two people who hated each other, hugging, in solitude.

Until my dad walks in.

—-

He makes a few notes as Squip mentions a mysterious project, looking to his right at the individual who has joined him in the surveillance room. The other man takes his hand and gives it a squeeze. "It had to be done," the man says before leaving him alone again, closing the door on his way out.