Remember me ♢Vampire Knight ♢

Reality

I have never felt so nauseous in my life. The room felt like kaleidoscope of images and I couldn't find myself standing up straight. How I made it back to my dorm room without falling is a mystery to me. In fact it was a miracle how I didn't wake up my roommate from stumbling into the bed in the middle of the night. Once I managed to get underneath the warmth and security of my blankets, it didn't stop my heart and thoughts from racing. This isn't real. This isn't real. But yet... It is isn't? I always knew Zero was going to end up transitioning to a vampire and I know he ends up being able to control his thirst of blood but... all that blood. It was so much blood.

I never feared vampires but being on the other end of being killed. I'm not sure I can handle that again. Why was I dragged to the scene, I'll never understand. Better yet, why was I dragged to freakin vampire knight is a better question! Why can't I just go home, nothing I do will change the outcome! At this point I can feel my throat tighten and tears dripping down my face. I started to remember my old life back home. My mother's warm smile and my older sister who would've been waiting for me. Now, I have no clue what happened to them. Was my life erased like how Akiras was erased here? Did my family forget me?

I spent years trying to find out how I can go back home but there was nothing. My identity back in my world is as none existent as Vampire knight was. As much as I wanted to cry loudly for my old life back home that is officially gone, I couldn't a make sound for fear of waking up my roommate. Underneath my mattress, I pulled out my journal. I had used the name Akira so often that for some reason I feared that I would forget my real name.

I am May

I am May

I am May

The next morning, I remember waking up before my roommate. My hand was sore and were beginning to form blisters from writing my name until I could finally sleep. I had grabbed my clothes and hurried to the headmaster's bathroom. I didn't want to risk Yuki planning to wake me up to find Zero or talk about the situation at all. Luckily I didn't run into any of the main characters and was able to get across to the headmaster's building.

The bathroom in the headmaster's guest room always felt soothing. I left the water running for what felt like hours. The mirrors fogged within seconds and all I could think of was just scrubbing off Yukis blood. My thoughts felt like they were going on repeat and I really wanted them to stop. But they didn't. In fact some memories that werent mine intertwined with the events last night. Instead of Zero attacking me, it was someone else...

A loud thump from outside the bathroom made my heart jump. Once I realized who it was I silently cursed to myself for being such a chicken shit.

"Akira are you feeling okay, you missed your morning classes" the headmaster knocked.

"Yeah. I caught a real bad stomach bug this morning and thought a warm bath would ease the pain" I lied. I know the headmaster didn't believe a single thing I just said because the tone of his voice was still very concerned. "I understand, if last night was a triggering so please if you need someone to talk to-"

"I'll be fine headmaster, please. My stomach was just upset this morning. I'll be back after lunch period is over" I interrupted. I wished all these people would just leave me alone. I just need a second to get a hold of myself and everything will be okay. It had to be okay.

Once I heard the headmaster's foot steps start to fade away, I finally relaxed. If I could say one good thing about this week, is probably the spa baths in the guest room. I usually had this rule when taking baths, never fall asleep. It might have been watching a scary movie but I couldn't remember which one it was. That's another thing about this world, why is it that I'm always forgetting about events in my previous life.  I leaned my head back to the edge of the tub and I can feel my eyes closing slowly. I'm so damn tired of everything.