Bet ~Jean x Reader AU~

Chapter 11: Pillow Frustration

It could never be unseen.

What I saw.

It could never be unseen.

Never.

It was forever etched into my brain. Every little shadow. Every little line. Every little movement. Every little detail. Everything I had absorbed through my eyes...it had all been cataloged into the deepest depths of my brain, forever burned into my memory. I could never forget nor erase what I had seen. No matter how hard I tried, I could never, ever, ever forget what I saw. Never.

I shook my head, fighting my thoughts before rolling over from my back and onto my side, squeezing my eyes shut. I was hoping to be greeted by the darkness of my eyelids, but that was not my luck. Instead, the image of what I had seen flashed through my thoughts, plaguing me with an ill feeling, prompting me to abruptly open my eyes.

"It's pointless," I whined. "I can't get that out of my head." I rubbed a balled fist against my eye. "I should've never investigated. I should've just kept walking on. I should've just kept going."

I rolled back onto my back and brought my gaze back to the ceiling. The shadows of the night slivered over the surface, blanketing it over with darkness. There was nothing eerie about it, but that wasn't what I cared about. I was still focused on what I had seen a few hours prior.

Images of them together; the two of them kissing. Him tracing her body with his hands. Her running her fingers through his hair. Him laying on his back in the snow, her on top of him, their coats scratching against one another. They were so immersed in one another, so focused that they didn't hear me. Luckily. But, I had almost wished they saw me. I prayed they'd notice me and freak out because what I saw shook me to the core.

"Sex," I mumbled. "They were having sex." I dropped my palm over my eyes, slapping part of my forehead. "Of all the things they could've been doing, why that? And why did I have to be so nosy? Ugh. I'm a jackass."

I yanked my pillow up over my face and moaned into it, the view I had seen still playing on repeat in my mind. I wished I could stop the film from playing through my memory, but I couldn't. My thoughts wouldn't let me stop. I was trapped, that snippet still rolling through my brain.

I could still see how she rested on him, moving up and down, back and forth on his lap. To be frank, I hadn't noticed it at first. I merely thought they were just dry humping...until I took a closer look. The zipper of his jeans was drawn down, the flaps folded over. On top of that, I realized she was wearing a mini skirt...in the winter...the short material slightly drawn up to reveal more skin than I needed to see. And on top of seeing that, I could still hear their moans rolling for between their lips. I could still see and hear it all.

Of course, after realizing what they were doing, I had quietly and quickly booked it out of there, a scarlet tint dusted over my cheeks. Even at that moment in my bed, I could still feel my ears and cheeks flushed red, the warmth washing over my features. It had been so utterly embarrassing and uncomfortable -a situation I never wanted to live through again. If anything, I wanted to delete it out of my mind forever...and ever and ever and ever.

But, of course, I had no such luck.

Defeated, I yanked the pillow away from my face and breathed out a haggard breath. I couldn't erase what I had seen. I couldn't just forget what I had stumbled on. It was the memory tattooed in my brain that I'd regret finding. I was scarred from that. They had been entangled in a moment of passion and lust, and I had been the idiot who decided to investigate. That was, of course, my luck. I could only wish I had been smarter.

I shook my head and sighed, "I'm such an idiot...but why...why were they having sex outside?"

I dropped my gaze to my window, watching as the streetlamp outside cast its gleam down, some of its luminance trickling in through my mesh curtains. I was honestly hoping the purity of the light would distract me, but that was not meant to be. I could still see them in my mind -still hear them. But, above all, I could recall the way he stared up at her, that smirk lifting the corners of his lips. Excitement and pleasure both masked his features, meeting the depths of his fierce golden gaze.

A familiar golden gaze that caused shivers to dart the length of my spine.

**Ello my sweets! The second chapter today is up. I know it's short, but it's still somethin', right? Anyway, next week (and hopefully for now on) chapters will return to being posted Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. As always, thank you so much for everything! Y'all are awesome!! Wuv yous!! <3**

-Noel Ross