Insecurities | KTH | Completed

Downpour

"I'm not hungry." I say, staring blankly at the TV screen.

"But you said you didn't have lunch over the phone?"

"I don't feel like eating right now." I brush him off.

He sighs, closing the box.

"You can eat if you're hungry. I don't mind seriously."

"Nah, I'll eat with you later." He shrugs.

I conceal my frown by giving him a dry smile.

We were now watching the second movie. All I could gather was a zombie apocalypse had broke out and people were dying other than that my thoughts didn't let me focus. Before I could pay attention, the credits start rolling.

I stretch in my place as my body went stiff after staying frozen in the one place for so long.

Taehyung turns to me. "Let's eat."

My body shot up. He quirks an eyebrow questioningly. I play it off by more intense stretching.

"It's getting late. I should head back."

He rolls his eyes at me. "It's only five thirty. Eat first."

"I don't feel like eating pizza."

"We have some curry rice if you want. I'll heat them up for you." He gets up.

"No," I fiddle my fingers, rummaging my brain for an excuse. "I-"

"Are you skipping meals?" He crosses the distance between us.

"What-pfft-no, why would I?" My breath comes out heavier than usual. He knows. I panic.

"Why are you skipping meals?" He tries to catch my wavering pupils, hands holding my shoulders.

"I'm not." I say defensively. "Did you forget who beat your ass last week in noodle eating competition?"

He frowns, boring hole in me with burning eyes. "First you changed your hair and now you're dieting? Why?" He almost growls in his deep voice. Goosebumps rose on my skin. He is so hot, I think sadly. I want to be someone he thinks in the same way I think about him. I don't want him to be ashamed of being with me. If I'm going to ask him to return my feelings then first I want to be someone worth his time.

"Are you doing this because of someone?" He asks.

Yes.
I shake my head.

"Who are you doing this for?"

You.
"Myself."

He sighs. "Tell me, what's wrong?" His gentle voice melts in my ears as he gets alarmingly close.

"Nothing's wrong, god, I'm trying to stay fit. Why is this becoming a big deal? I'm changing what I don't like about myself." I remove his hands from my shoulders.

"There is a difference between staying fit and starving yourself." He points out.

I scoff. "I'm not starving myself."

"Great. Then let me get healthy curry rice for you." His emphasis on healthy made me cringe.

"Honestly, I'm not hungry right now and Naina probably made something for us and if I eat now, I won't be able to eat later." Finally formulating a good excuse, I mentally smirk.

"Naina is going for dinner with her boyfriend. She literally screamed that in front of both of us yesterday."

SHIT

"If you're done with your lame excuses, can we eat now?"

"I don't want to. I'm going home." I pick up my phone and wallet from the couch.