Wings (Jcpenny)

I Just Wanted To Be By Your Side

Jenn:

I never understood the meaning of love. So far this what I know. It dosent keep you sane. If the other gets hurt you want to hurt yourself. The person you love may or may not love you back. if they don't sucide or self harm was the usual ANWSER well in my case. To everyone I was just Jenn. Jenn the funny little girl that is light as a feather and doesn't seem straight in the head. Well everyone expects O2L to be nice well no.

They are ungrateful, selfish, greedy, heartbreakers, and hurtful humans. Also a few are quite dumb.

I'm in tears at the moment. My arm is bruised and my scars from early in the month decided it would be okay to bleed.

*Flashback*

"Jc I have something to tell you." I say.

Here it goes I'm saying it.

"What is it Jenn?" he says softly.

"I'm just going to get straight to the point. Jc I love you." i tell him.

I look into his eyes and he looks into mine.

His eyes where soft at first then it was filled with hatred.

He glared at me.

"Jenn you know I would never think of you that way! I have a girlfriend! AND IM VERY HAPPY! GO FIND ANOTHER VICTIM TO LOVE YOU!" He screams and pushes me to the wall.

The wall hits me hard on my back and my shoulder gets bruised by a book shelf. The book shelf drops glass cups cutting my wrists.

"J-Jc!" I cry as in screaming and sobbing.

"GET OUT NOW YOU SLUT!" He screams at me.

I run out and blood drips on the floor.

I begin to run and run towards a bell tower at a Christian church. I hid there yes because I would always have those dreams of falling from the top and dying at the bottom. I'm at the top and I'm at least ten feet tall.

*back to present*

I begin to cry.

His words.

They cut more than razors.

Hurts more than death.

Feels like fire burning you heart.

And when the light goes out it throbs in pain.

I hate him!

"I hate you!" I scream and throw glass cups at the wall.

He was my love.

I'm really sure because every time he would hug me or touch me I would feel this spark. That spark wasn't just any spark it was something that made your stomach flip upside down and you would be hypnotized by that person that caused that spark.

My phone begins to ring.

Cloud☁️

I see as the caller ID.

It rings about five times and I finally anwser.

"H-hello?" I say while sniffling.

"J-Jenn?" He says.

" What do you want! You want to scream at me-" i say.

"No Jenn I-" he says.

"You what?! You want me to rot
in hell!" i scream through the phone.

"Jenn I'm sorry but I don't love you." he says.

"Look what you said an did I would never forgive you! Take your sorry it isn't worth shit! I just wanted to be by your side and you said what you said." i say and take a deep breath.

"It showed your true colors." i say.

"Jenn I'm sorry why do you want me to say!?" he says.

"There is nothing you can say or do it's just changed everything!" i between Jenn.

"J-Jenn please!" he says.

I hang up.

I cry and cry.

No more little Jenn.

No more faking it.

Real me is coming out watch out Jc caylen you've underestimated me.