HER HERO: Chapter 1

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I know it can cause instability and makes me paranoid. That someone chase and hunts me. I am neither a good catch. I am lame. Who the hell will waste his time spending stalking over my house every night? It happens since Jago died. But didn't retaliate against them. I don't want Catherine to notice my behavior either, because I don't want her PTSD to get back. I just left the house at dusk and told mom not to tell Murry that I was just going somewhere. That's what I love about her she doesn't show uncompromising and not much disciplinary.

I went to Riggs' hideaway and caught up with Oliver. Both squalled and had no idea how to get first to say something. He was just really looking at me I didn't know what to do. Riggs was busy and so were his other football teammates as well as Jasper, Merrick, and Bradford. It was as if I could not step on my foot and finally numb.

''Hey,'' I know my introduction is a bit trashy.

''Hi,'' He answered emphatically. 

''Hey, Sanders,'' Riggs says and placed his arms over Oliver's shoulders. 

''Oliv-'' I speak before he finally leaves in front of me. He turned and looked into my eyes. ''Oliver, I just want to say sorry, and I know I am stupid. But I know you don't deserve to have a friend like me.''

''Really?'' He smirked.  ''What if I say you are lame and nobody can stay with you.'' Oliver grinned, but he continues. '' Nuh, I just fooling you around.'' 

I heard him chuckled. He suddenly hugged me and makes me into tears. Jasper and I just looked at each other giving a hint of our helloing.

The alcohol made me stupid in the way that fear can do. You can be drunk on fear and alcohol just the same, addicted to rumor as much as rum, yet words can also elevate the soul and a gin can be just the tonic one needs. Alcohol is a poison, one that many find addictive, especially those under stress and with genetic predispositions to such biochemical responses. To have it so readily available in times of social stress is an MF's own goal for any nation - rippling toxic harm into society.

Merrick had left a few cigarettes to burn themselves out. The smell of the smoke is one thing, transient though unpleasant, it was a kind of particulate sewage. I recall the stink on everything, and the bottle slop due to excessive intoxication of Riggs, Bradford scooped him up.  I noticed that it was late, Jasper accompanied me to go home, which was also one of my reasons for Murry would not scold me. 

Jasper and I didn't pay attention to each other I knew there was still a part of him that was too distracting for me. I kept more of my doubts between the two of us. But I was completely amazed between the utterances of the mouths even though not a word came out when the two of us got home, I saw the ambulance opposite our house, at that time I wanted to find Murry. As I approached and slowly stepped on my feet punishment began to fall on me. I saw Catherine being put in the ambulance as my hearing became blurred at that moment, it became vague for me. Murry told me that I don't need to go to the hospital. 

''What happened to her? Hey please tell me!'' I begged him.

I could see the sadness in his eyes, and it looked like a trace of desolation on his face completely. Jasper was there next to me while I am being depressed by what happened to mom. Just let myself watch as they boarded the ambulance away from where I was. Jasper has been my wall from the moment I have nothing to lean on because of what happened to Catherine. He held me in both arms to ease the excruciating pain I feel now.

''Hey Sanders, look at me, everything will be going to be alright,'' He mumbled.

''I don't know, I don't know. How can I be sure that nothing bad will happen to her?'' I replied with irrational anxiety.