A Court of Beasts and Shadows >ACOTAR Fanfic

Chapter Twenty-Four

I fell asleep in the library.

After I had watched for hours on end, Bryaxis torturing Keir slowly and brutally, Keir's screams filling the cavern, I had gone back up the library and had fallen asleep amongst the books.

"Rhea, Keir went missing."

I looked up at Cassian, no emotions playing across my face. "I know, I was the one who took him."

Cassian knelt beside me, and when he spoke, his voice was soft and gentle. "Rhea, what did you do?"

My eyes flickered to the pit. Cassian followed my eyes and sucked in a deep breath.

"Holy shit, Rhea, you gave him to Bryaxis?"

I looked down at my lap. "It was time to face my demons. I had a...chat with him. Is it true Keir was my father's uncle?"

"Yes" replied Cassian, quietly.

***

Keir was still alive.

After-all, Bryaxis needed a play-thing. But he would suffer. Every day. Until Bryaxis deemed it fit to kill him.

Azriel, when he heard the news of what I did to Keir, had merely wrapped an arm around my shoulders. Rhys hadn't spoken but had relaxed when he heard Bryaxis had "taken care" of Keir.

Mor had hugged me, until my ribs felt like they were going to crack under her embrace. I soon found out Keir was Mor's father but had been horrible and abusive towards her. So, Mor didn't care if Keir was dead.

I had stayed silent through everything. I wanted to be by myself.

Which was why I was in the forest, forcing myself to fly.

My wings screamed at me in protest, not ready, but I needed to feel the pain. I had to feel something.

Why couldn't I feel anything?

I had thought killing Keir would bring me closure but...I felt nothing. Nothing. No hate, relief, or even guilt for what I did.

"Rhea."

I didn't bother turning around. "Azriel, please, I want to be alone right now."

I heard his footsteps come closer and I spread my wings, pain ripping along my back.

"Rhea, you're going to hurt yourself, stop."

I turned to him, rage filling me. "I don't care."

I shot up into the sky.

The pain was agonising, my back felt like it was on fire again, my wings felt too heavy. I forced them to fly, to keep them up, but suddenly I was tackled, and wings tangled with wings, shadows collided and suddenly I was on the ground again.

"Rhea."

Azriel was on his knees in front of me, his wings out, eyes on me and I stood. I could feel warm blood trickle down my back and knew I had hurt myself.

"I'm tired of being weak" I said quietly, anger in my words, "I don't want to be chained ever again. I don't want to be hurt. I don't want to cry anymore, I want to be strong."

Azriel stood, and I saw blood on his hands. I looked down and saw my claws had slipped out. I stumbled forward, not believing what I had done to Azriel.

I took hold of his bloody hand and looked up at him, wide-eyed. "Az, I'm so sorry- "

"It doesn't matter, Rhea" interrupted Azriel, wiping the blood on his pants and I saw three long gashes on the back of his hand, seeping blood. I shook my head, trying to fight against the onslaught of tears. Why was I always crying?