A Court of Beasts and Shadows >ACOTAR Fanfic

Chapter Thirteen

I decided to spend the night in my old room, Azriel's right next to me. He didn't even bother asking for permission, he just took the room and dared anybody else to try to argue with his eyes. I was relieved it was Azriel who took the room and not Tamlin, who turned into that beast when he heard Azriel was in the room next to mine and I quickly left, leaving my father and Tamlin to 'sort things out'.

I tossed and turned in bed, unable to sleep, thoughts darting through my head. Tomorrow, after Eris's voting, I would be forced to go to the Spring Court, to live out an eternity with a High Lord, as his wife, as a consort, to bear children, to be side-lined, to never have a say in anything.

I yanked the covers off me and stood up, grabbing my old cloak and tied the clasp around my neck. Who cared if I went around in my nightdress? I left the room, heading for the high balcony.

As I stared out at the stars and the moon in the night sky, I felt tears come to my eyes. I had been a prisoner for fifteen years of my life, only to have freedom for five, and then be forced to be mated to a High Lord. I would never know freedom again.

I should never have come to talk to Kallias.

Tears fell down my face and I leaned against the balcony, looking down at the drop. I could just turn into shadows and leave, never look back. Leave my father, Azriel, Tamlin, Eris behind. Find a new life somewhere in the world.

And what about Tamlin? If his temper succeeds his obsession to find me, he will hunt me and would never let me go.

"Why are you crying?"

I turned around to see Kallias standing there, his silver hair striking in the night. I bit my tongue to try to stop my tears.

"I'm mated to a High Lord" I replied, my voice breaking, and he tilted his head. "Is that such a bad thing?"

I wiped away my tears with my cloak sleeve, looking up at him. "I wanted to be free, to travel, to not be tied down to anyone or anything, and now I'll never be free."

Kallias walked over to the balcony, leaning against it, watching me. "No one knew Rhys had a daughter" he said, as if insulted he never knew and I shrugged. "I was Under the Mountain since I was born, I was there for fifteen years until Amarantha was killed."

I knew Kallias was curious about me. The daughter of the High Lord of the Night Court that no one knew about.

"I was Under the Mountain for forty -nine years. I never saw you or heard of you."

"I was one of Amarantha's many playthings. She kept me locked away." I didn't look at him as I said those words.

The darkness that had lasted for years, unable to properly breathe in the iron mask, unable to talk, only my screams could be heard.

I fought back the wave of terror and finally looked up at the High Lord of the Winter Court. I remembered what I needed to ask him.

"Was there a female in your court called Dekara twenty years ago?"

Kallias's eyebrows rose but before he could reply, a dark figure appeared and snarled, and I turned to face Tamlin.

"What's going on here?" asked Tamlin, his jaw set, claws at his hands and Kallias turned to face him and I saw his face bore a mask of ice. "We were just talking, Tamlin." The tone of his voice made the conversation final.

Tamlin turned his gaze to me and I didn't back down from his stare. High Lords were dominant males, but I would never back down to him. I was not going to be weak-minded.