A Special Dedication To My Son

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This story is lovingly dedicated to my son, Joshua Lee Brooks. He was born July 29, 2005 and left us to be with God on September 13, 2016. Although I know he is in heaven, the pain of his absence is incredible. At times, it is impossible to think, the depression being overpowering, but life has to continue.

As Josh's sixth grade year began, he had become very excited about being in the band, sixth grade being the first that he could. Although he waffled a bit, all of us knew he wanted to be a percussionist. He always walked around the house tapping on every surface, and had been for several years. Percussion was already who he was.

That school year began with a large number of potential percussionists, however. The band director held an audition to see who would be percussion, since he couldn't have the 15 or so kids that wanted to do it. Joshua made the cut and his excitement bubbled over. He was so proud of the achievement, and I was proud of him and for him.

The day he told me, or maybe the day after, I took him to Mike's Music in Eagle River to get his beginning percussion bell kit and music book. When we returned home with the bell set, we wasted no time assembling it. Yes, some assembly was required.

On that first night, he played with it for quite a while, even allowing his brothers to get a few taps in on the bells. Amazingly, I even had some time with it. That was maybe a week before it all happened.

On that fateful Tuesday, September 13th, 2016, he came to me as soon as I woke up. He handed me a white cable, obviously a Wii cable, and asked me to help him hook it up. I went to his bedroom, where he had placed a TV and Blue Ray player on the shelf directly in front of his bed. Rather convenient for him, and not as much for his two brothers who shared the room with him.

I hooked the cable up and then wondered why I had done so. "Josh, what are you wanting to do," I asked him, not seeing a Wii anywhere. "I want to hook up the DVD player," he replied. A little confused at this, considering I had just hooked up a Wii cable, and he knew the difference, I shook my head and examined the Blue Ray player and the TV. Everything was already assembled and ready to go. Those should have been signs to me, as Josh knew how to hook these things up, at least enough to know if it was or not. I told him it was ready to go, hugged him, telling him I loved him and got ready for work.

That morning, after I left, he complained of a slight headache to his mother, but there was no fever. As a dutiful parent, my wife sent him to school. A little after 9:30, he called my wife's cell phone from the school nurse's office crying that he had a bad headache. My wife wasn't able to answer the phone, so he left his tear filled message on her voicemail.

At 9:47 I received a call from the school nurse, telling me of his headache and asking if it'd be alright to give him some pain reliever. I readily agreed, and asked if I needed to come get him, but she suggested waiting to see if the pain reliever would work. Seven minutes later, she called back, informing me that she wasn't comfortable giving him a pill, that she felt he was too lethargic to swallow it.

I told her I was on my way, but it would probably be about 30 minutes. I immediately left work, heading to Mirror Lake Middle School from Anchorage. As I pulled out of the parking lot, my wife called and said she had gotten the message and was almost at the school. Although she suggested I return to work, I decided to just take the day off and go to our old house to work. We had just moved the Sunday before, and still had a lot to get done.

Just as I crossed over Eagle River, my wife called me again. "His left side is unresponsive and his face is slack on that side," she said, or something very close to that. She then informed me that EMS was on the way and they were heading to the hospital.

My heart sank at this news. I knew what those signs typically meant, but 11 year old children didn't have strokes. That was simply not possible, but the signs couldn't be argued. In actuality, it was his brain under pressure inside his skull, and not an actual stroke, although the symptoms were similar.

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