Legion of Lawndale Heroes v1

1.1 - Skunkworks

1.1 - Skunkworks

On a fateful day in world history, "Cuddles', a member of the ancient family mephitis mephitis, known as the common striped skunk, found himself free in the woods of Lawndale.

His brothers and sisters, badgers, polecats, other non-striped skunks and other woodland wildlife made their break for freedom after a jailbreak assisted by three college kids from Lawndale State University who also doubled as members of the Animal Liberation Front. Barbara, the leader, was bicycling down the road one day when she could have sworn she saw the eyes of a caged skunk peering at her through the windows of an unmarked van. 

She decided to follow the van to its destination, a bricked building with no windows near Lawndale's post office. Eating a nutritious vegetarian snack while keeping notes on unmarked white and gray vans which pulled to the back of the building, Barbara assumed the building was a research facility of some kind, where little bunnies would have their eyelids cut off and doused with perfume. Which meant, of course, that a liberation action would have to take place.

The three ALF members pulled their own van up to the back gates and tasered the guard who came out to meet the vehicle. The doors opened, and the ALFers found themselves inside a large, expensive looking animal research facility. 

JACKPOT!!

They spent the next thirty minutes releasing hundreds of animals. There were so many animals that the ALFers would have to open the cages, take as many of the smaller animals as they could, and hope the larger ones could make it to the wild on their own.

When an alarm finally went off thirty minutes after their arrival, the three made a hasty break for the exit -- but steel doors had locked the three college students inside the facility and trapping any animal that hadn't escaped into Lawndale proper. Which, unfortunately for Barbara and her two friends, were only the largest and slowest of the animals. The facility had lost over ninety-five percent of its test stock.

These facts would have been lost on Cuddles. Already, his experiences at the facility faded out of the few neurons that comprised his brain. Operating on instinct, he made his way toward anything that smelled of wildlife, continually running and nibbling on random trash before leaving downtown Lawndale and heading for the suburbs. As a member of the noble skunk family, anything human would have made a hasty retreat if it had crossed his path.

His paths briefly intersected with Steve, a squirrel from the facility. Steve's glowing red eyes, two burning coals lighting up the darkness, might have taken human beings aback -- but Cuddles was not concerned. He sought the safety of the woods, forgetting everything but the peace his small mind sought.

(la la LA la la)

Daria stood on an upside down metal bathtub. "Tell me why I'm doing this again."

"Statue of Liberty," said Jane, "perspectives, from different angles. The muse has hit me and I want to be able to look up her nose hairs."

Daria prayed that Trent wouldn't see her like this, holding up a flashlight and wearing a tiara made out of a paper plate. "Just how many 'perspectives' do you need? My arm is hurting a lot."