15. Missing You

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We share something so common

Still so rare, and I'm in awe

Never been here before

So high, we're still climbing

Even here inside these walls

Breaking each other's hearts

And we don't care cause we're so

In too deep, can't think about giving it up

But I never knew love would feel like a heart attack

It's killing me, swear I never cried so much

Cause I never knew love would hurt this fuckin' bad

The worst pain that I ever had

-Trey Songz

_______________________________

Ray Pov

It was Saturday morning and I was in front of Craig's door. I don't know whether to knock or not. Today I was supposed to have lunch with his mom. I haven't talk to him since Tuesday. I miss him but he can be crazy sometimes. I don't want him too flip out on me and shit just because he chose not to take his meds.

What if he attacks me because of something I said or did? I love Craig dearly and I should stop being a wimp and face him.

I take a deep breath and knock on the door. I look down twiddling with my fingers as I hear footsteps come near. I hear the door crack open and I look up to see a gorgeous dark skin woman looking to me with mocha colored eyes like Craig. She smiles at me and I smile back.

"Hello... I'm Ray. I'm looking for Craig."

"Hello I'm Wanda, Craig's mom. Its nice to meet you ray. Why don't you come in? Craig's up stairs in his room." I nodded my head and step into the house.

I looked around it had a nice home feeling to it. It smelled like sage and jasmine. Craig's mom told me to head on up stairs if I'd like or she could go get Craig for me. I told her that I'll just head up and it was really nice to meet her.

I walked up stairs and walked down the hall to Craig's room. The door was shut and everything was quiet. I could faintly hear water running from inside. Is he in the shower? I open the door and closed it behind me and sat on the bed. I guess I'll just wait for him here.

I looked around his room and seen everything looked the same since I've last been here. I played a game on my phone waiting for him to come out. Soon the shower shut off and the bathroom door was opening. Craig came out with a towel wrapped low around his waist and chest damped for the shower. He was brushing his hair and humming a tune to '2012' by Chris Brown.

I cleared my throat and he looked up at me. We stared at each other for a while before he spoke first.

"What are you doing here?" His voice was deep and raspy.

"I came to talk. Haven't seen you since Tuesday when we argued. I miss you." I said softly.

He just looked at me and shook his head. He walked over to his dresser and pulled out some boxers. He let the towel drop to the floor and stood there naked. I bit my lips and he started putting lotion on his body.

"You wanted to talk, so talk Ray or get the fuck out my house."

It hurt to hear him say that. He turned around and looked at me. I couldn't help but look him up and down. I almost moaned at the sight of him naked in front of me. I bit my lip and rub my arms looking down into my lap. I feel like I'm about to burst out in tears.

"Craig... I love you and you know I do but I'm scared. Tuesday you obviously wasn't on your pills and flipped your shit on me all because I thought that girl was flirting with you in the lunch room. I don't want to be in no relationship that I'm scared of. You know?"

"Okay. So I wasn't on my meds, big fucking deal Ray. Grow the fuck up. I love you and I asked you for forgiveness but no you walked away from me! How do you think I feel when the boy I love walks away when I say I'm sorry! Pissed! That's fucking how." He yelled.

"Craig I'm-." He cuts me off.

"No Ray, don't 'Craig' me! I fucking love you and I apologize to you. You didn't even say you love me back! The fuck out of here with that shit man." He started putting on his gym shorts.

"I love you Craig and I'm sorry I walked away and didn't sat it back. What more do you want from me?! You scared the shit out of me. Punching walls and shit. What more can I do Craig. You're fucking bipolar. You don't want to take your meds and you scare me. I'm scared of you Craig." I whispered at the end.

He walked towards me and pulled me up. His grip was tight on my arm and it was starting to hurt. I whimpered and tired to pull my arm from him but he tightens his grip.

"Scared of me? Why Ray, I don't do anything but love your ass." He said softly.

"Let go Craig."

"No, I want to know why you're scared of me. Is it because I don't take my meds when you want me to?"

"Yes Craig it's because you don't take your meds. I'm scared you might hurt me one day. I don't want to be scared Craig." I cried

His grip loosens and he pulled me closer to him. I look into his eyes and I could see the different emotions in them. I caress his cheek with my thumb. No matter how much this boy hurts or scares me I don't think I can leave him. He wouldn't let me and I wouldn't want to.

He slowly wraps his arms around my waist and brings his forehead to mine. I can feel his minty breath on my lips. I take in a shaky breath and release it.

"Don't cry baby. I'm sorry I scared you. I never meant to I swear, I just don't want to be dope up all the time. But I'll try harder. Okay?"

I nodded my head and he wiped my tears away. He pecked my lips and smiled at me. I laid my head on his chest and breathed in his scent. I hugged him tighter to me and told him I'm sorry to.

"Now show daddy some love baby." I laughed and hit his shoulder playfully.

"I thought we were having breakfast with your mom boy."

"She can wait real quick. I want a quickie."

"No. Now come on, your mommy seemed really nice. I want to meet her and not after she hear me have a 'quickie' with her son."

"She hear JoJo all the time." He laughed.

"Mhm.... Maybe after I'll show daddy some love." With that I pecked his lips and walked out the room.

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