Catching Rainbows

9

"What?" Chloe asked, starting to turn.

"Don't look," I pleaded, and she immediately turned back around. "My ex." She hadn't seen me yet and I hoped like hell she wouldn't.

She winced. "Bad break up?"

"I walked in on her and my older cousin," I said dryly. "She told me she was a hundred percent gay, and he's definitely the penis-having sort, so it was awkward to say the least," I added,  letting my hair fall in a curtain that I peeped at the disloyal bitch through. "I mean, I get that people realize later in the game that their sexuality is not what they thought it was. She could have told me though." Monica, my ex, stretched and said something to an old lady with a little brown dog. 

For all I knew, they were still together. I didn't talk to my cousin Jared anymore, though he'd been my best friend once upon a time.

"That sucks, what the hell is wrong with people," Chloe said in commiseration. "Are we going to fight her? I'm down."

I flashed her a surprised smile, amused and feeling better. "She's not worth the trouble," I assured her. "It's been over a year." Don't say it, I warned myself, but I never listen. "It was the same day my mom died, actually."

"Fuuuck," she said, shaking her head. "Seriously, I'm sorry. How fucked up is that? Wow."

I was embarrassed that I'd told her. I barely knew her, for God's sake. "Sorry, I overshare." I watched as Monica straightened and began walking toward the parking lot, on a course that would take her right past our bench. Because of course.

She was putting her hair into a ponytail when she looked up and saw me. She stopped in her tracks, her face falling. She had tried a million times to apologize, but fuck her. I'd given her almost three years of my life and she'd played me like a fool. I didn't care what she had to say.

I made my face stay blank as I met her eyes and then deliberately turned away from her, this girl who had once known all my hopes and dreams. "Anyway," I said to Chloe. "That must be cool to go to The Splash Zone whenever you want."

She brightened, but then I could see her tracking Monica's progress past us because her expression grew chilly and her eyes narrowed for a few moments when the other girl's eyes met hers. The solidarity made me feel warm inside. 

"She's almost to the parking lot," she whispered quietly. "And yes, it is cool, and you totally have to come with me. Do you think Hailie would like it?"

I felt relief that Monica was gone. "I'm not sure. Maybe we could just go without the kids one day?" I wouldn't mind having Chloe to myself, that was for sure. "I mean, I can't leave my aunt with Hailie for too long without a break, but three or four hours should be okay."

She looked at me levelly. "She's lucky to have you. Both of them are. I bet you're amazing with her."

I got my chance to show how untrue that was half an hour later. We'd eaten this amazing Italian pasta salad with sourdough rolls, though the kids hadn't stopped playing, which was fine. I rarely got adult time and talking without being interrupted was blissful. Especially given the company.

More people had trickled in until it was getting loud and chaotic, and I knew it was almost time to take Hailie home so she could melt down after all the stimulation.

Taking kids with special needs out is a catch-22; even if they have a good time, the fallout afterward is not always worth the activity itself. But quite often they'll have a meltdown at home anyway, so might as well get an outing in if you could.

We were tucking the containers back into the plastic bag when I heard Hailie's wail of frustration rise. "Uh oh," I said, my heart tripping uncomfortably in my chest as I jogged to the sand pit.