The inevitable chance of love

Chapter 7

I sat on the floor in my room thinking of nothing in particular. For certain hours of each day my mind goes completely blank, I go lost. I watched Auntie Hafsa my dad's immediate younger sister as she held tightly onto her four year old daughter Aisha, pressing the phone closer to her ears. It made me recall when I saw her forty days ago with trembling hands and shuddering lips, Her eyes drained of color.

"But you were supposed to come a day after us" she spoke lower and I could hear the hurt in her voice. she was probably talking to her useless husband. I averted my gaze from her and stood up leaving the room.

They say death is inevitable but when is comes unexpectedly it leaves you in a muddle, it pushes you off all tracks. It detaches you from reality and shatters all form of zeal and happiness in your heart. That is exactly how I felt when I heard the feeble sound of my mother's voice through the phone. All air was knocked out of my lungs as I made out the words she said through her continuous sob.

"Baban ku ya rasu (your father has died)".  

Everything around me stood still. I myself stood still not able to say anything. It couldn't be. The only thing I could hear at that moment was her sobs muffled by my own.

[Innalilahi wa inna illahi raji'un]

[From Allah we are and onto him we shall return]

Those were the only significant words I could comprehend and pronounce. I walked pass the living room to the kitchen and out the back door seeing that Ya Alamin had guests with him, another Batch of sincere consolers. I groaned as the events of that awful night came flooding back into my head and I felt my heart ache. I recalled how I pulled Ya Alamin's warm body into my arms as I sighted him in the parlor when we arrived from Abuja. He was silent at first but he held me tighter and I listened to his inaudible sobs. My brother was a tough guy but even the strong ones have their time of weakness. I also recalled how I rushed to my mother when I saw her slumped down on the floor.

"What happened" I questioned.

She only looked at me before she pulled me into her arms and I hugged her tight repeating my questions over and over again. I understand that no one can cease or refrain from the will of Allah but I just couldn't wrap my head around the fact that he was gone. My best friend, my greatest supporter, the most important organ in my system, my happiness, my everything.

Ya Rabb.

Even after The final rites were done the next morning and his corpse was taking out to the Janaza ground (burial ground), it did not dawn on me yet. I still thought if I walked into the parlor I would see him sitting on his favorite chair or if I walked out to the backyard I would see him watering the plants like he always did.

A few nights after the burial was the night my mother called us all to her bedroom and I watched how her expressions changed with each word she spoke.

"It was cancer"

"What?...how" I asked.

"Since when?"Ameera asked.

"He was a veterinarian, he worked with animals for twenty-six years of his life, he was bound to catch something. Plus the man knew nothing of the word REST" ya Alamin said gaining a smack on the back of his head from mama.