Alex and Xander (#1) {Completed}

Chapter 04

After a long day of trying not to think about Xander and drool, I finally end up finishing my leftover college work and happily I lie on the bed for a much-needed sleep but just as I close my eyes, my phone rings.

It's Xander.

"Hi" I reply trying to sound not so excited.

"Hey beautiful, had your dinner?"

"Yes, did you?" I ask him back.

It has been a daily routine for him to call me every night for the past few weeks before I go to bed. And every night it's the same thing but still I can't help but feel happy that he calls and asks me even if the answers are always the same dull and boring one.

"Hmm how was your day? I hope my crazy sister didn't make you mad?" he chuckles and bet he is shaking his head a bit too.

"No, she is great, I like her" I reply smiling.

Amy may seem over excited and talk way too much still you can't help but love her. I wish I could be free like she is.

"So you free this weekend? Mind going out with me, just the two of us?" he asks me clearing his throat a bit in the process.

"Um I... I uh" I stammer.

I didn't expect the turn of events like this tonight even though I knew he would ask me out sometime. It is not as I did not see the hints he was giving out to every time we met he would make sure I know that he is interested in me.

Still the idea of dating someone has long been gone and still here I am letting the person feel like he has a chance with me. Am I doing the right thing by making him feel I have interest by not pushing him away?

I have not gone on any dates after David. Not like, I did not try but I was always scared that he would do something if I went. He can be quiet scary at times and I would like to stay as far away from him as possible as the terror he left is still there and I still have nightmares about him.

"Hey relax no pressure there, I won't mind if you don't want to" he says reassuring me but the sadness in his voice gives him away.

I know I should have said something before to let him know I do not want him to show any kind of affection to me, may be it would have been better but I led him on for so long.

Does that make me selfish and bad? Have I become so desperate for some male attention that I led him on but still hold back to go out and give him a chance? What have I become?

"Please say that I haven't ruined my chance by asking you out so soon? Anything Alex to know that you aren't mad at me" his voices breaks my train of thoughts.

Not knowing what to say to him I sit silently. Shall I say no and save him from the destruction I know I'll bring into his life or for once I could give in and not let him ruin a chance to do what I want and be happy?

He really is a sweet person always looking after me. May be it will not be that bad going out with him and I cannot always let my fear from David rule me. I need to let go of my fears sooner or later, it is only playing games with me.

"Okay, where do you want to meet?" I ask him slowly not knowing what else to say.

The silence is what I get and I look at my phone to see if he had hung up, but nope.

"Great, I will pick you up at nine?" his voice comes out suddenly excited.

I pull the phone away a bit as he shouts. Okay that's really not how I thought he would react. My But none the less hearing him so happy makes me feel happy as well may be this is what I needed.