Pounds // larry stylinson

Letter One

dear no one,

i haven't got a clue as to why i'm writing this .. i guess it's a way of not feeling so alone, because i feel like that a lot, alone, i mean. my mum left the house tuesday night, she hasn't been home since, it's now saturday. my dad keeps shouting at me like it's my fault and it's starting to scare the twins, making me hideout in my room, once again, alone. my lightbulb had burnt out yesterday, and i am too afraid to ask my dad for a replacement bulb, thinking that he'll yell at me for that too. it also doesn't help i'm absolutely terrified of the dark. yes, a fifteen year old boy is afraid of the dark.

i didn't eat yesterday or today, but yet, i still managed to throw up some food.. at least it's out of me now.

i can't help but start to think that i want to just end my life right here, right now..i hate this life. i hate being called fat. i hate being gay. i hate my family. i hate my stupid teachers and my stupid school. but most of all, i hate harry styles for tricking me into thinking he would actually be a friend to me and then embarrasses me in front of everyone.

what did he do to me, you ask?

since i am pretty much, severely, bullied at school, he went up to the rude kids and started yelling at them about me and he even mentioned how he saw me throwing up my lunch, he was screaming at them so loud to stay away from me, but yet, i didn't see why he needed to do that, because now they're going to pick on the fat, bulimic, kid who is feeling suicidal.

what harry might of thought while doing that, is that they probably would leave me alone after seeing i have a friend who will "protect" me and possibly even "kick the shit out of someone", well, harry is about as intimidating as a baby penguin.

i just remember the horror, seeing him get right in there faces, yelling at them, it wasn't even his screaming that got me scared, because i couldn't be phased at all by that, but it was the things he was screaming.

"do you see what you're doing to that boy right there?!" he said and then was pointing at me. "you're making him feel so bad about himself that he had to go throw up his entire lunch! you're killing him!"

and god, i don't think i've ever ran that fast before, the way i did out of that cafeteria, even with tears streaming down my ugly face.

Louis x

[wAS THIS OKAY UDHSIDNDIDND??????????]