Loyalty (JoshxBrendonxTyler)

7. Mental

Trigger warning: panic attack.

***

In the break room, Brendon is sat eating another bagel-- plain, with strawberry cream cheese-- while Debby sits in front of him, again, blabbering like she's use to.

He doesn't know why she's suddenly taken interest in his life, she never has before. She would give him quick glances and casual smiles but that was just Debby. Now, if she wasn't sat with him, it felt a bit off, and Brendon didn't like it that way.

No matter how much Brendon felt like he needed someone, he didn't want it to be Debby, he's learned.

She's too loud for his anxiety, too nosey for his paranoia, and too selfish for his self-esteem.

That's never someone you want to be around.

At first, having Debby around was okay. It gave him a chance to talk to someone besides Carina-- although he never really spoke-- but after a week and a half, Brendon came to the conclusion that whatever she was doing for him wasn't for him, but the exact opposite.

It was sick how she was using him for her own benefit.

He can't believe someone felt so pitiful for him they felt like they had to be his hero.

She was anything but.

Maybe Brendon thought about it too much. Maybe she really was trying to be helpful. Maybe she really did care about his well-being.

Then, he looks at her again, and it's obvious she doesn't.

She's putting on more lip gloss and adjusting her bra, talking on-and-on about how much work she's having to do lately, but oh, luckily she's Debby and she can finish it like it's nothing. She doesn't ask how he's been doing as of late, or if he might be struggling with work. Brendon's never had a friend in a work setting, but he'd imagine that's what it would be if so.

Brendon sighs, finishing his bagel.

He sits there for at least another three minutes; he can't believe someone can talk this much.

How is she breathing?

After that thought, his phone vibrates. Brendon feels like celebrating. He doesn't want to sit through this anymore.

Brendon slides his phone out carefully, knowing Debby would continue her one-sided conversation anyways. Even though it was obvious, now, that he wasn't paying attention.

Not that he was in the first place.

I didn't get my coffee this morning.

Uh oh. That's not good.

I'm going to have to stop by Starbucks now, ugh.

Brendon chuckles to himself. Josh really did need his coffee.

What's wrong with Starbucks?

Brendon liked any kind of coffee, really. He wasn't picky. Starbucks had a comforting smell of cocoa and it made him feel warmed. He wasn't bothered, he liked it.

Nothing. I just like complaining.

Smiling, Brendon's thumbs move against the keyboard. He doesn't even think about his surroundings any longer, he just wanted to text Josh.