Random Drop

14 (Part ll)

                                                                                 2 weeks later
Exams, wow, did I hate them, more boring than sitting in class and listening to a teacher droning on about civil rights and maths. I sigh, my teacher looks up, 'Miss Jackson can you please be quiet' Eyes turn to me, "Get a great look everyone, the boy friendless freak," I think to myself, 'A picture last longer' I snarl, everyone turns back to their work. 'Grace, can you please go outside' I sigh, and get up, taking my bag with me. I feel eyes burn into my neck, but I ignore them, and shut the door behind me. My teacher comes out a few minutes later, I slump against the wall, arms crossed. 'Grace, I know what happened is devastating but you have to let go and stop feeling sorry for yourself' The teacher stands in front of me, her glasses hanging around her neck. 'What would you know' I snap.
The teacher shakes her head, 'I don't , but what I do know, is that the first step to moving on is letting go, Jose is gone, no one can bring him back, i know you loved him, but the only way is to let him go.'
I sigh and glare at the ground. 'If you want to, you can come back in and finish the exam, everyone has been told to leave you alone, I am keeping an eye on you, but I can't help you unless you help yourself first' The teacher extends an arm towards the classroom's door, I push myself of the wall and go inside, no one looks up, I sit at my desk, and grabbing a pencil, I try to concentrate on the questions.
~~~~~
'So he's got a wife and kids? Why do we need to know that?' Sarah asks, she looks blankly at the laptop's screen. 'Because, if we find him, I can sorta taunt him' I shake my head. 'Then if you do that, you're just as bad as he is' She looks at me. 'What? No, I just want to tell him, what it's like if he watched his wife or kid get killed in front of him, i want him to feel the pain that i felt, when He died. Don't you see where i'm coming from?' I turn to face her, Sarah nods, 'Sadly, but why are you so desperate to find him' I feel the blood drain from my face, 'You're kidding me right? Jose's dead!' I snap, realizing I just said his name, tears fill my eyes. Turning away, I look at the ground.
'Grace, i'm sorry' Sarah places a hand on my shoulder, 'Yea, I know, sorry I snapped.' I turn back to her, 'Do you want to go to the library?' She nods and we get up and head for the library, the new kid walks past us, i stop, Sarah crashes into me, 'Why do you keep doing that?' She whines, then she notices him and nudges me, I shake my head, and look down, the boy turns and smiles, his brown hair, slicked to one side. Sarah grins, and urges me to keep going, reluctantly I move and we continue to the library.
'seriously, are you going to ask him out or what?' Sarah asks, from the other side of the table. 'What?No... well not yet anyway. I don't know' I shrug, and look over John's profile, 'Uhh, you're so boring, I mean, he's new, he has no clue about last year, why don't you ask him already' Sarah picks up a old dictionary. 'You know why' I say, not looking up. Sarah plonks the dictionary beside my laptop, making me jump. The librarian looks over, Sarah smiles and sits beside me. 'You have to get over it, He's gone, Grace, no one can bring him back, your turning into a zombie, honestly if I wasn't your friend, you'd be eaten alive by now.' She peers at the screen, 'I know, He's gone, I get it, but it's harder, when you see someone you love get killed in front of you, I mean, he got shot, it's different, i just wish everyone stop staring at me, like im a bomb or something.'
I go and find a picture of Jose, it's one of the happiest pictures i have, he's smiling and kissing my neck, I was squealing, and trying to get free, but he held me close. I smile, remembering his smile and his kiss. Sarah looks at it, 'You loved him didn't you?' She asks, putting an arm around my shoulder. I nod slowly.
I remember when he came out of the changing rooms after his swimming practice, his hair dripping wet, was making the front of his shirt damp, which was sticking to his skin, his broad chest and shoulders were seen through it.....
I shake my head, biting my lip, I cringe at the thought of remembering him. 'What was that?' Sarah asks, a smile creeping onto her face. 'What was what?' I ask, looking over at her. 'You were thinking about him weren't you?' I don't respond, but look back at my screen. 'I don't blame you, he was kick ass hot' She smirks, I hang my head, trying not to smile, 'Even Sarah had a crush on him. But I was the lucky one' I think,hiding my smile. Sarah laughs, but gets cut short by a warning hiss from Ms Galga. I grin, 'Shame, did everyone like him?' I ask,looking at the picture again. Sarah sighs dramatically, 'Who didn't. But, no offence ,but I have no clue what he found in you, I mean, sure you were cute, but damn girl, he was steaming, I still can't believe he picked you, I guess you weren't throwing yourself at him all the time I suppose' I smile, 'Maybe he liked the quiet ones' I nudge Sarah, who glares at me, but smiles back.
~~~~~~
Later that evening
A soft voice, barely a whisper wakes me, 'Grace' It calls softly. Unable to ignore it much longer I sit up slowly. Sitting at the end of my bed a ghost looks back at me, familiarity strikes me, my eyes grow wide, 'Don't scream' It says, I nod 'Jose?' I ask, in a choked voice, the ghost flickers but remains visible. 'You need to find the guy who killed me' Jose's ghost touches my leg and nods to my laptop, suddenly feeling weight, the ghost smiles before fading, I stare in disbelief at the spot where Jose was sitting. Blindly I reach for my laptop, flicking it open I find that my gmail has a new email, clicking the icon i find the message, inside is the daily route John Hodi takes, I shiver in awe, before blacking out.