(OLD)More Than Just A Scientist

~(Y/N), Please~

Jared was out for the day and you were lounging around your room, your heart throbbing. You knew you were just using him to fill the void Rick had left in your heart. God it was so hard being away from him. You truly thought that Rick did love you, but apparently he didn't. It's your fault for being such a god damned idiot, (Y/N), and you know it. Deciding to rid yourself of these thoughts, even for a little bit, you grabbed your flask and downed a bit of the hard whiskey that was in the metal container. Grabbing your phone, you went to Deezer and found your 'Favorites' playlist, putting it on shuffle.
'Do I Wanna Know?' by Arctic Monkeys began to play and you lazily sang along.

"Have you got color in your cheeks?
You ever get that feeling that you can't shift the tide.
That sticks around like something's in your teeth"

Your voice was surprisingly soft, considering the fact that whenever you were alone, you would be sobbing, causing your throat to become sore.
Why did it hurt so much having Rick gone? It's not like he was the sweetest guy ever, right? Jared was much sweeter.
Right.
But it hurt. It hurt you so much. Groaning, you downed the rest of the whiskey, not even phased by how it burned in your throat.

Your P.o.V.
Fuck... why the fuck does it hurt having Rick gone like this? Why do I want to forgive him? After what he did to me? He doesn't deserve any forgiveness. Not after going with some big-titted bimbo. What had I done anyway?
My eyes were sore. They were also beginning to water.
I wouldn't allow myself to cry in front of my friends or in front of Jared, but when I was alone... oh boy. When I was alone, I swear I could've created a whole new ocean just by crying. Rick had left me in the worst way possible. I wouldn't even wish this upon my worst enemy.
I wonder how Rick is doing...
He's probably just off with some chick or he's making something. Ahh Rick, always the creative guy. I knew that I still loved him, but Jared was so sweet to me. I wiped my eyes and huffed, deciding it was time to stop torturing myself. I reached for my phone once again, pausing the song and clicking on the chat Jared and I had been having.

You: Hey dear!!! How are you?
Jared <3: Hey hey hey! If it isn't my princess. How's it going honeybee?
You: haha... you falter me, my prince. I'm doing well! Would you like to go out to that barbecue place down the road?
You: Flatter** fucking autocorrect.
Jared <3: Pff.. I falter you AND flatter you? Man, I must be a catch!!!
Jared <3: But of course! I love when you ask to take me out on dates.
You: is that so? Well! I'll see you after work?
Jared <3: Rodger. Sounds like a plan. Love you sweetheart. ❤️
You: Delightful... I'll see you later honey. Love you too.

Another thing I loved about Jared was that he used cute nicknames. God he was adorable. I don't know why Rick was still on my mind.
Maybe it was because of all the excitement Rick brought to my life. Jared was... he was great but Rick was so interesting. Compared to that scientist, Jared was like a stale piece of bread. I really need to get out of the habit of comparing the two men. I knew who my heart belonged to though.

Rick's P.o.V.
I couldn't think straight. My mind was all over the place. Suicide was the topic that came up the majority of the time. Everything reminded me of that girl I had hurt so badly. I knew I hurt her, but I was hurting as well. What the fuck was I thinking? I hated myself. I was full of so much self loathing that I had somehow found myself with a gun barrel pressed to my head more than once while getting lost in thought. My family had started to avoid me. Morty doesn't bother me anymore. That's a good thing. I don't want to bother with the brat anymore anyways. I knew I didn't really think of him like that, but I didn't care much. This whole thing was getting to be infuriating. I don't know why I care so much. I've never cared this much. Not even for Beth.

Maybe I should visit her.
I huffed and shot a portal into the ground, jumping in to jump out into the girls room. She was staring at her hands that laid in her lap as she sat on her bed, seemingly too lost in her thoughts to realize I was there. I cleared my throat, gaining her attention immediately.

"...Rick?"
"Hey (Y-Y/N)."
"What the fuck are you doing here?"
"I came to apol-"
"No need."
"(Y/N) plea-"
"I said there's no need."
"(Y/N) co-"
"Shut the fuck up. Just shut up! Ok Rick? You fucked up! You fucked me up! I loved you! I loved you and I thought you did too until I found you with some... with some skank!!! You expect me to forgive you?"
"(Y/N) I-"
"Stop."
"Stop interrupting me damnit!! Just l-listen to me. I-I'm sorry. I'm so s-urrp-sorry f-for what I did. I don't know w-urp-what the f-f-uurp-fuck I was thinking-"
"Clearly."
"But I need you to forgive me. Please (Y/N)."

I hated this. I hated having to beg for her forgiveness. I really fucked up. Damnit.

Your P.o.V.
I wanted so badly to forgive him. To run into his arms and to kiss him until all my problems deteriorated away. My heart pounded against my rib cage and it felt as if it was going to jump out of my chest and into his hands. How had he managed to do this to me? I stood and took a step toward him, my eyes watering. He smiled sadly and opened his arms slightly, looking as if he was waiting for me to jump into his welcoming embrace. I stepped forward once again, about to hug him when my phone rang, snapping me out of my trance. I went to my phone and opened the message, smiling as I read it.
Jared <3: Hey honey bunny. Why don't we go to (F/Restaurant) instead!
I glanced at Rick before typing my message. I was with Jared. I couldn't just go back to Rick. It would be ridiculous to go back to someone like him. He cheated on me.
You: Yeah!! Sounds like a fantastic idea. I'll see you then!
Jared <3: I can't wait to see you.
I giggled and turned my phone off, turning my attention back to Rick.
"Sorry, but I've got a date with a loving man tonight and I would appreciate if you left now."
Rick sighed and nodded, shooting a portal. I'm assuming back to his house.

[I am officially back! I was dealing with a really bad relationship, as well as school and some other really stressful situations. I got out eventually, but I really couldn't find any motivation to do anything. My ex was abusive and managed to convince me that writing was pointless. I finally got back into writing though, so here!]