Crazy (Crankiplier)

12: prepare

Ethan

I finally fall asleep after thinking for a long time.

Once I got up I was still kinda tired. But definitely more energized then I was. I sigh and get up.

Your gonna do it soon

Might as well get prepared

By doing what, I'm gonna jump

By writing a note

You can keep it with you

Ummm... Ok, I guess I will...

Suicide note...

I rip a page from a notebook and grab a pencil.

"Dear everyone,

I love you all but this world isn't my place. Every time I look at myself I feel disgusted. I can remember the slurs of kids at school and the voice of him, he ruined my life, he killed my father and raped me. I feel depressed now. So here I am, I'm going to decide to end my life and cut it a bit short. I can't be happy here and I can't do anything about that. So this is goodbye, by time you read this I'll be dead... Goodbye everyone, tell my fans I love them and will miss them, you can tell them as much as you want about this situation (I'd rather them know then whole story tho).

Goodbye

~~~Ethan Mark Nestor-Darling "

That's done...

Now the fucking pills.

I go into to bathroom and grab my antidepressants, I haven't been using them recently though.

I put them in a small bag that also had the note.

When will I do it?

A week....?

A couple days?

A couple days

Ok...

Now that's out of the way...

A/n: so two days ago if you were on Ethan twitter by then you'd know Ethan went to the ER because he had an allergic reaction to peanuts, he also mentioned this on twitch, but now he is back home and doing well, he did take yesterday to take care of himself, but today he should start posting videos, what happened to him wasn't something to joke about, I know you guys won't do that, he appreciated everyone who took this seriously and cared about what happened with him. I love Ethan and don't want this to ever happen to him or anyone, I couldn't imagine ever losing him, I'd be miserable. I'm obviously NOT gonna write a chapter about it because I don't want to wrote about my favorite person almost dying by something that could really happen to him, not that depression can't happen to him, I don't know where I'm going with this but anyways bai!