When Shadows find Light (SOTAM FF) ✔️

Broken - Tam's POV

Okay, this is one of my first actual stories. SO please don't blame me if it's short or anything, i'm gonna try to make it longer. So, enjoy! Please feel free to comment your thoughts and ... Yeah. Alright, onto the story. 🍪🍪🍪🍪

I couldn't believe it. 

Here, imagine this. You chase someone, you chase them to the ends of the universe, hoping and praying that they reciprocate... 

Hmm. Let's say this is metaphorical. For peace of mind, of course.

As I was saying, have you ever been chasing after someone, and then you get that glimmer of hope– that light in the darkness, that yearning, that they share the same feelings as you? But then, as you're finally about to let go of any worries, they get together with someone... well, frankly stating; they get with someone that's not you? 

Well, if you said no, then you're lucky. If you said yes, then, let's suffer together, because I, Tam Song, the creepy Shade, have just been shut down. 

After some time, just when I was about to ask her... Biana, by the way, she got to Keefe first. Er- no. Allow me to rephrase. Keefe got to Biana first.

Before I knew it, my foot flew out in front of me, as if it had its own mind, and the trash bin in front of me went sprawling from the sheer force of it all. My throat rose with words equivalent to the bitter taste of bile, and I swallowed harshly in order to keep from cursing out loud. I gulped down the growing feeling of recurring resentment, storming to the wall and punching it in frustration. Anything, I pleaded. Why can't I do anything to ease the disgusting feeling of being alone? 

My knuckle began to throb painfully as I took deep breaths in a futile attempt to calm myself. I felt like laughing, laughing at myself and all my misfortunes. But I knew that doing things such as that would do absolutely nothing to help me in the long run.

 "Come on, Tam." I mumbled to myself, my hand reaching for my jagged silver bangs. They were a discreet reminder that Linh and I were strong and could survive, but frankly, truthfully, I wasn't feeling it at the moment.

After taking a long breath, I stood up and walked outside for air, the night sky welcoming. The night sky enveloped me in its cold embrace, and the cool, crisp air seemed to rejuvenate me. Closing my eyes, I inhaled, then exhaled, feeling the fresh air travel into my body. 

 A gentle jostle of soft underbrush snapped me back into alertness, my back straightening and arms tensing, preparing to strike whatever was behind me. "Tam?" 

I turned at the sound of a familiar voice. Oh. It's just her. 

"Linh, what are you doing out here? It's late." I said, staring at her hands, which were rubbing against each other anxiously, my gaze traveling from there to the tip of her shoe, which was gently rubbing the scattered leaves under its rigid soles. Her silvery stare seemed to follow my gaze, and she crossed her arms. "Well, I would be able to sleep if I hadn't heard a huge thump in the room next to mine." she said, frowning, her eyebrows furrowing just the smallest bit. Linh looked at my bleeding, swollen knuckle. "And now I really know something's wrong." Her stern expression softened ever so gently, turning back into the down-to-earth, albeit timid expression she almost always wore. She shivered, pulling her crossed arms closer to herself. I carefully undid my cape and offered it to her. 

She pushed it back to me, shaking her head in refusal.

"Tam, is... is this about Biana?" she asked, looking at me with taut concern embedded in her soft facial features. "No, I... It's not that," I tried to say. I tried to persuade her. I really did, but in the end, she was still my sister, the person who had known me all this time, the person closest to me in this world. "I promise you don't have to worry about me, Linh. It's a waste of time."

 The girl huffed, cold, misty air following each breath she took. "It's been half a year, Tam! If you don't want to let go of her, at least don't cry over her." she tried, gesturing at my injured knuckle. I hid it behind my back, the action inducing slight pain. "I wasn't crying." I informed her, moving my hair out of my eyes and blinking. Linh sighed and uncrossed her arms, resting two of her fingers feebly at her temple as if she were tired.

"If you're not crying, what are you doing to yourself? Tam, I saw your knuckle." Instinctively, I moved it further behind my back. Linh exhaled loudly, her cheeks brushed a light shade of pink due to the cold bite of the night. "You see? Even you know what you're doing is wrong, don't you?" Linh tucked some hair behind her ear, noticeably getting fidgety. "Yes, I'm aware. I know what I'm doing, Linh, trust me. I'm trying to, you know, blow off some steam, I guess you could say." I looked straight ahead into the night sky, but suddenly, the cold air that had welcomed me outside had turned a little too cold, numbing the tips of my fingers and making me shiver.

"Tam. Please just listen to me. Just this once. I know you're usually the one who ends up doing all the protecting, and I'm more than grateful for that. But please, let me help you. Talk to me, Tam, I'll listen," Linh said quietly, hugging herself. 

I sighed, watching thin, white puffs of my warm breath dissipate into the cold night sky.

"Fine. That's fine with me."

I saw Linh glance at me in the corner of my eye, but I kept my gaze straight ahead. Once she turned back forward, she cleared her throat. "So, uh..." Linh's voice trailed off, her head tilted in deep thought. "So it is Biana that you're trying to get over, right?" she asked after a while, turning to look at me. I grabbed the hem of my sleeve tightly. "Yeah. Yeah, I can't really say anything else besides that," I tried to joke. The pale blue eyed girl eyed me curiously. 

"Why'd you punch the wall so hard?" she questioned, her eyes traveling down to my bruised knuckle. I shrugged. "Felt like it," I answered bluntly. Seriously, though. What else could I do, punch myself? Punch Linh? No. "I felt like blowing off some steam," I said after glancing at Linh's concerned face. "I promise I'm no psychopath." 

The corner of Linh's lip twitched upwards, but she forced it back down. "Can't say I agree," she sighed, stretching her hands out towards the sky. "Most people I know don't usually smash their hands into walls. But I guess we all have our own methods. Either that or I don't know enough people." She smiled, and I couldn't help but feel more relaxed. "Yeah. Guess so."

The next moments were of silence, but it was peaceful; it was tranquil. Linh's presence was like a wave of calm, an ocean of serenity. "So you'll try to hold back on the wall-punching for now, right?" The girl asked suddenly, breaking the comfortable silence.

"Well, if you want me to, I'll try. But progress is not guaranteed."

"It's the thought that counts, I guess."

I rubbed my eyes, which were now heavy with fatigue. "Should we head back inside now? I take it we're both a little sleepy, huh?" Linh laughed, but it was cut short with a large yawn. "Mhm. Let's go." 

I began to walk inside, but stopped when I noticed Linh wasn't following me. "What's up?" I asked, turning to face her. Linh wore a gentle smile upon her lips, and a feeling similar to comfort blossomed throughout me. "Nothing. Let's go, Tam." Her steps were evenly matched with mine as we headed inside, and I closed my eyes, allowing myself a moment of quick relief. 

This time, as I headed into my room, equally scattered with the trash I kicked and all the unpleasant memories, something was different. I no longer felt very worthless; I didn't feel very angry or frustrated anymore.

I no longer felt very broken.

-edited successfully at December 20, 2018!-

lies. i'm back again two years later, more determined than ever to make this the best quality story for you all. for this chapter i went for more of a sibling bonding moment to show that romantic love isn't the only type of love out there that's comforting.
-sept. 21, 2020

HELP

-re-re-edited feb. 5, 2021