TRACKSiDED

용서*

What I can't seize, and it's a mystery to me still today, is why did she carry on meeting me?

The most significant interrogation mark is, can I forgive her someday?

I think I can't, even despite everything Brad told me. I can't, and I doubt someone can blame me. Still, I can't help but being glad knowing Jane is alive somewhere.

Is this normal, or is there something seriously wrong with me?

I stop pondering as other thoughts start to queue up as I'm about to live another epic scene of my life.

How much can this heart of mine take?

A lot seems the appropriate answer.

The whole scenario appears surreal. One would believe it's a book, but it's the story of my life. A twisted tale that isn't getting better as I watch Kyeong Soo Ae walk down the aisle.

Soo Ae has never been this beautiful. I've dreamt of this scene again and again, but never did I imagine this. My breath is stuck in my throat as she links hands with a man who isn't me.

It's Kyeong Soo Ae's and Cha Woo Bin's wedding, and I'm a spectator.

Nothing in life is carved in stone; I acknowledge more than ever as the ceremony begins.

It's a prestigious wedding, but one can't expect anything else for an Olympic gold medalist archer and her businessman husband.

Soo Ae avoids looking my way; I almost want to thank her. A reminiscing stare would be too much for me to handle.

I loved Soo Ae with all my might, but sometimes love means letting go.

I didn't realize at the time, but the reasons for the break up with Soo Ae weren't just linked to my self-destruction mission. Deep down, I knew Soo Ae deserved a better love, and I can tell by the way Cha Woo Bin is gazing at her that he is ready to endorse the responsibility of giving her that love.

As they kiss, I decide to leave, I'm not a fan of weddings, and I don't want to find myself facing her.

The rays of light burn me as I step out of the Shilla hotel.

I wish it would rain; I need water.

We're in July; it's hot and stuffy. It should be raining; I sound evil, don't I?

I doubt the Just Married couple would appreciate it, but I obsessively desire rain to drop. Huge raindrops that drench you to the bone and make the street deserts.

My skin feels dry; I feel like a fish stranded on the beach. I could go to a swimming pool to wallow my lost first love, but it's Saturday, and the pools are crowded and what I want is peace. All I can do is loosen my necktie in the hope of getting more air.

I have to admit, when the trial opened, I wanted Soo Ae by my side, I yearned for her harassing text messages, but nothing came.

Then the gossip made its way to my gran's restaurant, and it's funny because I was pissed, thinking to myself Soo Ae should be pampering me.

Yeah, I'm that selfish; Soo Ae is lucky to have gotten away. The vampire I am would have sucked the life out of her.

"Let it rain, jaebal."

I walk down a few blocks when my phone vibrates. I pull it out of my pocket; I see the caller's name and take the call.

"Yeobeoseyo."

Three sentences are all I hear before my phone falls to the ground, and its screen shatters. The sounds amplify, and then nothing, I can't understand a thing. I turn on myself confused, dizzy; I fall on my knees. Passers-by stop to stare at the man whose shame is covered by drops, huge drops.

It starts to rain.

Sometimes, just sometimes, God seems to listen.

Hi,

Just one more chapter to go, and it's over.

Who do you think called Tae Won?

And what do you think they said?

Stay tuned for the last chapter of my 1st first POV story.

Thank you for reading. You're amazing.