Tendril | Kylo Ren x Reader

xxv. nothing but a failure

"It seems as if Force training is the least of your worries." Snoke spoke as he sat before you on his dark throne, eyeing you as you sat on one knee, gesturing with two fingers for you to stand up. "But, with a lightsaber... A double edged lightsaber, I can only imagine what strength you'd unlock." Lifting his chin, he studied you. "A regular lightsaber is too easy for you, that is why I gave you that one."

Following where his hand pointed, you eyed the lightsaber hilt that lied on the ground just before you. "It was brought to my attention you didn't use enough of it during your mission to D'Qar... That is why they will be battling against you. Eight against one. I want to see just how... talented you are with a lightsaber." Snoke waved his hand as all eight guards stepped closer towards you as he sat back.

"And, don't worry. Their weapons can withstand a lightsaber. This... This won't be easy." He snickered as you swallowed, nodding your head once before picking up the lightsaber you now claimed yours.

Watching as the eight guards now circled you, you took in a deep breath, trying to focus on each and every one of their Forces in order to see any incoming movements. Hearing the shifting of one of their feet, you instantly ignited the double edged lightsaber, twisting in your spot and blocking their move.

And, from there, it was on.

One by one, they attacked you with swift movements, quickly building up the sweat on your body as you soon found yourself panting. Gritting your teeth and moving your arms—and the entirety of your body—you blocked and blocked and blocked. Your breathing echoed within your ears, the sound of your blood pumping and your heart racing deafened you.

Twirling your lightsaber, jabbing one of the guards with one end, and then another guard with the other end, you were suddenly caught as one of the guards got hold of the center of the hilt, pulling you to them. "Agh!" You grunted as they snatched the lightsaber right from your grip.

"Don't think for a second you can use the Force." Snoke called out. "You can only use your body! Use it, channel your anger. Channel that fear within you! Turn it into hate! Use that hate to drive you into defeating them!" Watching the guards circle you, you instantly ducked as one of them swung their weapon at you. Then, you caught hold of their staff and snatched it from their hold, protecting yourself from the others.

"Yes... Yes! Feel the frustration! The fury!" Snoke clenched his fist as he watched you eagerly, seeing the way you moved your body. How you kicked, how you swiped your legged, how you used their weapons against them.

You were becoming cocky, too cocky, your aggression was driving you on the verge of going on a rampage. As you continued to fight, grunting and yelling, you mustered all the force and strength you had to attack. But, as you thought you had one of them, another came right for you and sliced the skin of your upper arm open as you hissed.

"Foolish! You must not leave yourself open! You must not keep your focus on one person!" Snoke shouted as he stood. "Your fear is to die, isn't it?! Will you die now?!"

Panting as your sweat trickled down your forehead, you clenched your eyes shut for a moment as you took a step back, your blood dripping onto the ground before you. "Do not disappoint me, Vega! I have brought you here... To become something! To be someone! To do what you believe is right! And you are only failing yourself!"

Feeling your heartbeat quicken, you reached out for your lightsaber and instantly ignited it, your aching body begging you to stop as you continued to get hit. More bruises appeared on your body, more scars littered your skin. "YOU WILL DIE!" Snoke yelled. "YOU WILL BECOME A FAILURE! YOU WILL DIE BEING THE NO ONE YOU ARE!"

Seeing red as Snoke was opening up parts of your mind that had never been opened before, you bit back the tears that formed in your eyes as the guards all ganged up on you, you continuously pushing to fight them but your muscles were begging for you to stop. This was nothing like training with Luke.

"FINISH HER!" Snoke shouted as he pointed a finger, but just as one of the guards came storming for you, you reached your hand out towards them and instantly twisted and closed your fist, watching the guard suddenly collapse to the ground.

Hearing clapping as the remaining seven guards took their steps back, Snoke walked forward and over to you, hovering beside you as you stared at the now deceased Praetorian guard. The way they lied there, their head twisted in an unnatural way. You felt your disgust crawl up on you, the chills running down your spine at the sight before you. You allowed your anger and rage to blind you... Just like on D'Qar, except, this time... You killed with no mercy. You killed for the sole purpose of killing and it made your skin crawl.

Turning your head to look up at Snoke and seeing that bone chilling grin, he spoke. "It's time."

You were losing all sense of control. You were losing that balance within you.

Being dismissed as you reached for your lightsaber, you then found yourself walking to the lift, holding back the tears that were now fighting to emerge. You couldn't hold it in any longer. The pain, the suffering, it was becoming too much. It was overbearing.

Exiting the lift and nearly rushing to your chambers, you instantly fell to your knees as you walked in, your shoulder shaking as tears crashed onto the ground beneath you.

Holding your face as you bawled, crying out in pain, the weight on your chest made it hard for you to breath. You had so many more fears than you had ever before. It was too much to bear, it was eating you alive.

"Ben... Where are you..." You panted. "Ben! Please!" You whimpered, shaking your head as you felt yourself crumbling apart.

Feeling your body shake as your lips trembled, you shut your eyes and tried reaching into your mind, in hopes you'd find Ben. In hopes he'd help you. That he'd guide you.

But the moment you entered your mind and saw the shifting high walls, you saw no one. You heard no one. Nothing but the walls rumbling.

Taking in a shaky breath, terrified of what would happen, of the fact that you were in too deep or that you'd never see him again, you left your mind. You knew you had to fight through it, for as long as you could, for as long as the light was there. And you knew what you had to do now.

"Kylo Ren..." Snoke said, leaning forward and watching his apprentice enter his throne room. "Kneel before me and place your lightsaber before you."

Coming to a stop before Snoke, Kylo did as told. Falling to one knee, unclipping his lightsaber and placing it on the ground in front of him.

"I was informed that you... You failed to kill your mother." Snoke said as Kylo had his eyes low, only to see his lightsaber fly from its spot, into Snoke's grip. "Some... TIE Fighter pilot had to do it. A disappointment you have become." Snoke snarled, placing Kylo's lightsaber beside him.

"You... You are a failure. You are failing your own men... You are failing me and you are failing yourself!" Snoke's voice raised as Kylo swallowed. "And this is the last time you fail me."

"I always knew you could never be as great as Darth Vader... or even your uncle, Luke Skywalker. You are just a weak, foolish boy who lacks guidance and confidence. A boy who is too attached. Who can not let go. A fool. A disgrace! A disappointment!" Snoke shouted as he stood from his seat.

"I have no use in you any longer. I have lost my patience with you. You are nothing but a child who will always fail. A child who could not save the First Order... or himself."

"You will fail everyone. You will bring everything to ruins. You, Kylo Ren, are nothing! Absolutely NOTHING!"

Just about ready to stand up and lunge, Snoke shot his hand out as bolts of electricity shot from his fingertips and through Kylo's body, sending him flying back as he hissed.

"You fool... You have reached your end. Your failure will be no longer. I have found a replacement. The one to do what you could never. The one without attachments. The one who will never fail me. Or the Order. Or themselves." Extending out his arm and presenting, Kylo took in deep breaths before looking over his shoulder and seeing the lift doors open.

〉〉〉〉

A/N

Who do you think just arrived? ;)

Thanks for reading! Votes and comments are appreciated!

〉 Nic