Who Am I? » [Stucky]

35. Goodbye

Rat-a-tat-tat... Steve's door was tapped lightly by a hesitant hand.

Bucky and Steve immediately cut short Bucky and his' merry conversation and Steve gestured for Bucky to hide in his bedroom as they had discussed nearly a thousand times. Bucky did as practiced and shut the door quietly behind him.

Steve strolled up to the door casually and swung it open with his usual beaming grin.

Sharon was stood there mournfully, her breaths rugged and unsteady and her eyes full of a pain, desperation and loss. She could barely bring herself to look Steve in the eyes. She was nipping the inside of her cheek in unease and her eyes were already lined with tears glistening when she looked up. She was hopelessly forcing herself to be brave and the attempt was damn near futile.

"I wouldn't ask if it wasn't urgent," she croaked weakly, her throat tight and restricted and her voice was sickeningly hoarse and her expression was even more pained. She looked tired and solemn.

Steve's stomach clenched and twisted in his body, it was like someone had shoved a knife in his gut and was twisting it. He felt goose bumps bubble up on his skin and his heart race. He didn't want to listen; he knew something was very wrong. Awfully wrong. Gravely wrong. His smile diminished to dust.

"But..." She spluttered, choking horribly as she tried to hold back the disobedient tears that had gathered. "She... Uhm..." Her voice trailed off and she placed a fingertip carefully to one of her blue eyes and dabbed away the droplet that had just spilled. "She hasn't got long left..." Her voice trailed off and she looked straight through Steve, a look of frustrated sorrow on her face; her eyebrows drawing together and her features tightening.

Steve let out a shuddering breath. The words had been a crippling blow and he felt his whole body turn cold and his heart sink in his chest. His worst nightmare had come and it was time to face his demons.

"I think she'd appreciate it if you were there when she..." She screwed her lips up into a pout, sucking them in, trying to contort her face in such a way that the tears receded back into her eyes; but she couldn't do it. She just shook her head.

"If it's a family thing... And its personal, I wouldn't want to intrude..." He said in a soft voice, his hands clasped formally in front of him, his gaze lowered with respect like an obedient soldier.

"She'd want you there... I..." She sucked in a breath sharply. "I want you there... It's only right."

Steve's eyes filled with sullen tears and in the absence of a tongue that had the ability to form words he just nodded completely mutely. He felt like he had a gag tied over his mouth and someone had poked him in the eyes with the tears that were gathering. "I'll... Uh..." He put a thumb to the flat behind him.

"Sure... Just be quick..." She was tapping her foot impatiently on the ground, tapping it in a frenzy of discomfort. Sharon's heart was breaking in her chest and though she tried not to overthink on it, she was lost in the dark mind-set. She was anticipating the horrendous thing to come and fighting against in all she could, denying it, forcing it away; trying to make every moment last.

Its times like that you appreciate just how valuable and tight time is and how you can't afford to waste a moment.

"Bucky..." Steve said in a hushed voice, rushing to the bedroom. "Buck..." Steve walked in to see him sat neatly on the bed like a Buddhist monk in meditation, crossed legged and catatonic.

"Yeah?" Bucky tilted his head up to look at Steve.

"I'm going to be out this evening... And back late. I just thought you should know," Steve bowed his head quickly and removed himself from the environment sharply. "If you need anything, call me on the mobile I got you..." He called and made his way back to the door, grabbing his brown leather jacket and rushing out the door.