Déjà Vu

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I'm not sure when I slept

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I'm not sure when I slept. At some point, everything just became a dull pain resonating in the back of my mind and with that numbness, I could push past the threshold of sleep. My movements, my motivations, were all robotic.

Somehow I managed not to burn myself on a hot pan or slice off a finger while cutting fruit for breakfast. Thankfully, Jordan forgave me enough to assist me with breakfast duties. Or he figured that someone that looked like the walking dead was not the best face to be greeted by first thing in the morning. So he ran food out to the dining room and I tended to the kitchen, never seeing the guests at all that Thursday morning.

I debated continuing work on the decorations after cleaning the rooms, but there was still a chance a guest might return during the day to enjoy the warmth of the fireplace or use the dining room to eat a lunch brought in from town. So instead, I dragged myself up to my room and collapsed into bed. The sound of Jordan's knocking woke me up and he reminded me that cookies and cocoa would be due in the next hour.

He didn't stick around after that and I was left to act as hostess alone. Once everyone was asleep, I went back to work on the decorations. I needed to get them all done that night. There could be no more late night sessions once we received our guests on Friday. I'd need to be perky and alert to deal with a full house. Thankfully, I pulled it off with a couple of hours to spare for a power nap. Admittedly, some ornaments looked a bit haphazard by the end of that night, but they were done and I could just stick the uglier ones on the far side of the tree where no one would see them.

After making breakfast that Friday morning, again with Jordan serving the guests in silence, I checked out the Trimbles. Then I headed upstairs to clean the rooms, prepping all I could for the new arrivals joining us that afternoon. It occurred to me that getting a nap in, as I had the day before, might be a solid plan. However, I worried the couple hours I had available to me before check-in time wouldn't be enough for a proper nap. So, instead, I dragged out my storage tubs and placed them by their respective trees out on the drive before heading over to the work shed.

I noticed Jordan's truck as I passed the parking lot and, though I had hoped he'd be busy attending to something inside the main house, I spotted his silhouette gliding past his front window as I drew close to the shed. Time, however, was limited. Even if he caught me in my vulnerable state, I didn't really care what he might say to me. It would be nothing I hadn't already said to myself and the words no longer had the stinging effect they used to.

I yanked a ladder out of the shed and began dragging it up the yard when I heard the click of a latch locking into place behind me.

"Do you need help?" His tone was flat and didn't reveal whether he was asking out of actual concern or over some malicious amusement that would only result in a reply denying me assistance.

"No." I tried to hide the labored breathing in my voice. The ladder was deceptively heavy and the cold, dry air failed to imbue my lungs with the oxygen needed to power my freezing muscles. "I'm fine," I muttered, hefting the ladder on to my shoulder, only for it to immediately slide off.

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